Sorrow and Bliss
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- Create Date：2021-04-08 08:53:24
- Update Date：2025-09-06
- Status：finish
- Author：Meg Mason
- ISBN：146075722X
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Summary
This novel is about a woman called Martha。 She knows there is something wrong with her but she doesn't know what it is。 Her husband Patrick thinks she is fine。 He says everyone has something， the thing is just to keep going。
Martha told Patrick before they got married that she didn't want to have children。 He said he didn't mind either way because he has loved her since he was fourteen and making her happy is all that matters， although he does not seem able to do it。
By the time Martha finds out what is wrong， it doesn't really matter anymore。 It is too late to get the only thing she has ever wanted。 Or maybe it will turn out that you can stop loving someone and start again from nothing - if you can find something else to want。
Martha told Patrick before they got married that she didn't want to have children。 He said he didn't mind either way because he has loved her since he was fourteen and making her happy is all that matters， although he does not seem able to do it。
By the time Martha finds out what is wrong， it doesn't really matter anymore。 It is too late to get the only thing she has ever wanted。 Or maybe it will turn out that you can stop loving someone and start again from nothing - if you can find something else to want。
Reviews
Kim
，
3。5 - started slow for me but I ended up liking it。
Amber
，
DNF at 45%。
Jessica Hutchison
，
I could go on and on and ON about this book。 Before I finished I was already recommending it to other people in my life。 The way Mason wrote about mental health， mental illness， and coming to terms with what that means for the foundation of an identity was poignant and deeply personal。 This was the type of book that left me reflecting and questioning different perspectives/experiences in my own life related to all facets of relationships from familial and platonic to romantic and the small inter I could go on and on and ON about this book。 Before I finished I was already recommending it to other people in my life。 The way Mason wrote about mental health， mental illness， and coming to terms with what that means for the foundation of an identity was poignant and deeply personal。 This was the type of book that left me reflecting and questioning different perspectives/experiences in my own life related to all facets of relationships from familial and platonic to romantic and the small interactions between acquaintances that we have on a daily basis。 The book is a bit dark， so readers should be mindful that the plot deals with suicidal ideation， depression， alcohol abuse， victim blaming， and gaslighting。 。。。more
Mara
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An enjoyable read with witty dialog and characters to root for， even when they make you want to scream。 So many emotions: frustration with Martha， sympathy for Patrick， appreciation for Ingrid's comic relief。 One of the takeaway messages， for me， is that it's difficult to truly understand the debilitating nature of mental illness。 How it makes what seems simple nearly impossible。 This glimpse into Martha's life， albeit fictional， was illuminating。 An enjoyable read with witty dialog and characters to root for， even when they make you want to scream。 So many emotions: frustration with Martha， sympathy for Patrick， appreciation for Ingrid's comic relief。 One of the takeaway messages， for me， is that it's difficult to truly understand the debilitating nature of mental illness。 How it makes what seems simple nearly impossible。 This glimpse into Martha's life， albeit fictional， was illuminating。 。。。more
Ingrid Taylor-Moss
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Read it twice in two days。
Kelly
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This book took me a long time to read。 I actually started it a few different times。 It was not a page turner nor an easy read but by the end I was glad I had read it。 Complicated characters， difficult family situations， marriage issues， mental illness， you name it。 It's a smorgasbord of emotion， self discovery， and some gut wrenching pain。 This book took me a long time to read。 I actually started it a few different times。 It was not a page turner nor an easy read but by the end I was glad I had read it。 Complicated characters， difficult family situations， marriage issues， mental illness， you name it。 It's a smorgasbord of emotion， self discovery， and some gut wrenching pain。 。。。more
James Graves
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Wow， what a book， literally couldn't put it down in the second half。 Wow， what a book， literally couldn't put it down in the second half。 。。。more
Ally Van Schilt
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Unsure how to feel about this book。 The format I should have loved felt choppy and it meant the book， for me， never really flowed。 The depiction of mental illness was raw and real， as were those in Martha’s “firing line” - I can’t quite figure out what it was， but it just wasn’t for me。
Clare Hilsz
，
Stone the flaming crows ！！ She be a sensational read this one ！！ I had heard this had the same vibe as Fleabag and the hype had me fizzing！ I was truly expecting it to be way more depressing （ along the same lines as “My year of rest and relaxation” by Ottessa Moshfegh） But sorrow and bliss is a true combo of sorrow and bliss！ Feeling all the feels ！！ I laughed out loud and sobbed big fat mascara streaming tears。Sorrow and Bliss follows the life of 40 year old Martha who is wrestling with her li Stone the flaming crows ！！ She be a sensational read this one ！！ I had heard this had the same vibe as Fleabag and the hype had me fizzing！ I was truly expecting it to be way more depressing （ along the same lines as “My year of rest and relaxation” by Ottessa Moshfegh） But sorrow and bliss is a true combo of sorrow and bliss！ Feeling all the feels ！！ I laughed out loud and sobbed big fat mascara streaming tears。Sorrow and Bliss follows the life of 40 year old Martha who is wrestling with her life， relationships and mental health since suffering a mental breakdown at 17。 It paints a sharp， witty， funny and heartbreaking portrait about relationships， love， mental illness and the messy complexities of life。 This book is an anti love story which flips usual love narratives on its head， and does a brilliant job at exploring the effect that mental illness can have on relationships （ siblings， parents and partners） but in such a nuanced and clever way ！ The relationship between Martha and her sister Ingrid is pure gold and written so well ！ I loved Martha and her husband Patrick’s unconventional love story！ I loved that Martha always says what we are all thinking！ I loved that even though Martha was so haphazard in her relationships she was still loveable， primarily due to the brilliant use of humour and snappy prose。 My only cause for pause was the unusual way in which the author deliberately does not name Martha’s medical diagnosis。 This left me feeling a bit bewildered and puzzled， although I did appreciated the note at the end of the book specifying that it was a fictional account of a medical illness and not specific。 I didn’t expect to love this book so much 。。。 I figured even if it was blah it had a divine cover so happy days that it was more bliss than sorrow ！！If you loved Fleabag and don’t mind a truth-bomb of a gritty， funny，sassy and sad novel then go forth and enjoy 。。。more
Ange
，
Such an interesting book。 Lead character very witty but also very troubled。 I went back and forth from loving her to despising。 Another review sold me by saying she enjoyed every single page。 I won’t go that far but really enjoyed it overall。 It’s very Fleabag。 Funny but dark。
Ellen
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Devilish， delightful detail and sections that are a sucker punch to the stomach， such is the emotional impact。
Sheryl
，
I was briefly a bit put off by the author choosing not to call out the mental illness diagnosed for Martha。 Using a dash or X in the audiobook seemed like a copout。 But as I kept reading， I decided that the actual name of the illness didn't matter。 I think people with many similar situations will be able to relate to this story in one of the characters。 And are there really Patricks out there？ He is a gem and I will miss him。 I was briefly a bit put off by the author choosing not to call out the mental illness diagnosed for Martha。 Using a dash or X in the audiobook seemed like a copout。 But as I kept reading， I decided that the actual name of the illness didn't matter。 I think people with many similar situations will be able to relate to this story in one of the characters。 And are there really Patricks out there？ He is a gem and I will miss him。 。。。more
Hannah Pike
，
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers。 To view it， click here。 Sorrow and Bliss follows Martha and her life more specifically。 Martha is forty and looking back on her life since reaching that age， friendless， jobless and alone now， she wonders why Patrick left in the first place。 Seventeen is when she first begins to show signs of a mental illness。 Returning to her childhood home where her dysfunctional family live， she wonders if it's too late to fix herself。 This was definitely a slow burn with mature themes and readers never really find out what Martha's Sorrow and Bliss follows Martha and her life more specifically。 Martha is forty and looking back on her life since reaching that age， friendless， jobless and alone now， she wonders why Patrick left in the first place。 Seventeen is when she first begins to show signs of a mental illness。 Returning to her childhood home where her dysfunctional family live， she wonders if it's too late to fix herself。 This was definitely a slow burn with mature themes and readers never really find out what Martha's diagnosis is， which would have been a bit more entertaining for the reader。 Overall， a decent book but it lacks something， whether this details from the plot or from the writing， it isn't clear。 。。。more
Molly McCormack
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Witty， heartbreaking and uplifting - all at the same time。 I’ll be thinking about this book for a long time。
Megan Berkal
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The story was cute but I really can’t get past how annoyed I was by the main character。 Also in trying not to stigmatize mental illness I think the author actually did a disservice in her characterization of mental illness。Protagonist aside， I thought the other characters were interesting but in general I thought the book didn’t live up to my expectations of it。
Harmeen Puarr
，
4。5 。 I loved this so much 。 I loved the writing style （which I’m unsure of how to specify ） and the depiction of mental health and how it impacted the life of Martha and those around her 。 Wow 。
Lindquistheather
，
Wow， this is a very real and raw portrayal of motherhood and mental illness， aptly named。 There is language。
Jane Mulligan
，
Sharp and clever - an enjoyable and compulsive read for the most part。 However， instead of respite and resolution， dealing with the eventual diagnosis veered off into self indulgence that felt repetitive and banal。
reading is my hustle
，
‘I seem to find it more difficult to be alive than other people。’i recommend this book SO HARD。this novel is perfect。 it is a tragicomedy about mental illness & depression。 it has gravitas， humor， & bits of snark threaded throughout。 it dismantles the idea that depression is a monolith via martha （view spoiler）[ a woman forced to examine her part in blowing up her life & all but forcing her husband to leave her。 （hide spoiler）] the first person narration is sublime。 martha is a keen observer w ‘I seem to find it more difficult to be alive than other people。’i recommend this book SO HARD。this novel is perfect。 it is a tragicomedy about mental illness & depression。 it has gravitas， humor， & bits of snark threaded throughout。 it dismantles the idea that depression is a monolith via martha （view spoiler）[ a woman forced to examine her part in blowing up her life & all but forcing her husband to leave her。 （hide spoiler）] the first person narration is sublime。 martha is a keen observer who shares snippets & stories about her family history in a clear， direct manner。 sometimes you like her， sometimes you don't。 her private despair hurt me。 her love for her sister almost broke me。 and her reckoning made me weep。 i explained it to a friend as being a little bit Fleabag: The Original Play， a little bit Nothing to See Here， + bits & pieces of Normal People。 and/but it has its own magic， its own narrative， its own nuance。 。。。more
Pam Poddany
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This book is so heart-wrenching， optimistic， hopeful， and witty and charming all rolled into one big great read。Martha is our narrator and she tells us the journey of her life thus far。 Jumping back and forth between the past and present， we meet her immediate and extended family， all of which are somewhat dysfunctional。 Martha is a wonderful character --she is also dealing with mental health issues that affect everyone in her life， but mostly her。 I loved the honest way this book was written an This book is so heart-wrenching， optimistic， hopeful， and witty and charming all rolled into one big great read。Martha is our narrator and she tells us the journey of her life thus far。 Jumping back and forth between the past and present， we meet her immediate and extended family， all of which are somewhat dysfunctional。 Martha is a wonderful character --she is also dealing with mental health issues that affect everyone in her life， but mostly her。 I loved the honest way this book was written and how well the angst and suffering of Martha was portrayed。 The book also explores relationships between parents， sisters， husbands， friends。 This is one not to miss; there were plenty of sad situations but also the book is filled with so much hope， love， and humor。 。。。more
SJ Rosenfeld
，
This is， without a doubt， the most incredible book I’ve read in years。
Penny Haw
，
Beautifully original story told with a distinctive voice and compelling narrative。
Andrea
，
Absolutely loved this one and flew through it。 The sister relationship especially rang true and made me miss mine。
Dannii Gardiner
，
Lives up to its title， at times depressing but also funny and brilliant。
Sarah Ginsberg
，
🎧 As many other reviews have mentioned， this book has way more sorrow than bliss。 I was constantly frustrated by Martha even though I should have had more sympathy for her。 In my opinion， too many of her negative qualities were emphasized so that I couldn’t see what Patrick saw in her and rationalize why he would stay so long。 Additionally， I found the unnamed aspect of the mental illness almost more frustrating？ Because the blank seemed to stigmatize the idea of the illness even more- it has a 🎧 As many other reviews have mentioned， this book has way more sorrow than bliss。 I was constantly frustrated by Martha even though I should have had more sympathy for her。 In my opinion， too many of her negative qualities were emphasized so that I couldn’t see what Patrick saw in her and rationalize why he would stay so long。 Additionally， I found the unnamed aspect of the mental illness almost more frustrating？ Because the blank seemed to stigmatize the idea of the illness even more- it has a “he who should not be named” feel to it where it becomes even more foreign and scary precisely because it is unnamed。 Wouldn’t the efforts put into the book have been better served destigmatizing an actual mental illness？ I enjoyed the ending， but in general this was not my cup of tea。 。。。more
Kim
，
Unnamed mental illness causing awful behavior。
Millie
，
This book broke me。
Dan QT
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I loved this book。 It was wise and kind to its many flawed characters， by turns heartbreaking and humorous and， sometimes， both simultaneously。 I think I was expecting a lot more "laugh-out-loud" funny moments based on the reviews， but the book ended up being more clever-funny， with numerous callbacks to earlier scenes and a rather surprising ending。 The narrator is Martha Friel， a sardonic and sullen food columnist who is in the throes of an unknown mental illness。 She's accompanied by a cast o I loved this book。 It was wise and kind to its many flawed characters， by turns heartbreaking and humorous and， sometimes， both simultaneously。 I think I was expecting a lot more "laugh-out-loud" funny moments based on the reviews， but the book ended up being more clever-funny， with numerous callbacks to earlier scenes and a rather surprising ending。 The narrator is Martha Friel， a sardonic and sullen food columnist who is in the throes of an unknown mental illness。 She's accompanied by a cast of memorable characters: a fertile， no-nonsense sister， a distant sculptor mother， a gay mentor who is also a recovering addict， a frugal millionaire uncle， and a partner called Patrick， whose goodness gives Schitt's Creek's Patrick a run for his money。 At one point， Martha reads her journal， and notes: "I saw shame and hope and grief， guilt and love， sorrow and bliss， kitchens， sisters and mothers， joy， fear， rain， Christmas， gardens， sex and sleep and presence and absence， the parties。"That's Sorrow and Bliss in a nutshell。 All of these things， coexisting at once， presented to us， the reader， with wisdom and care。 Excited for what's to come from Ms。 Mason。 。。。more
Sandra
，
'This is the worse thing Patrick has ever said to me: 'Sometimes I wonder if you actually like being like this。 ''This story is told in the 1st person by Martha who was a carefree child until her mid teens when she started being overwhelmed by crippling fear and sadness。 Martha has an undiagnosed mental illness and is hand balled by different doctors all with various diagnoses。 Essentially Martha doesn't get the medical treatment she needs & begins to feel that the crushing lows she experiences 'This is the worse thing Patrick has ever said to me: 'Sometimes I wonder if you actually like being like this。 ''This story is told in the 1st person by Martha who was a carefree child until her mid teens when she started being overwhelmed by crippling fear and sadness。 Martha has an undiagnosed mental illness and is hand balled by different doctors all with various diagnoses。 Essentially Martha doesn't get the medical treatment she needs & begins to feel that the crushing lows she experiences is part of her life。 She begins to develop toxic dependency with her closest relationships causing them to move away for their own self preservation。 This is not an easy read and I developed both an empathy and annoyance with Martha， as she dwells further into herself， ignoring the needs of those around her。 Although no specific mental illness is named it does show you how hard it is to live with yourself when your every day feels like an overwhelming thing。 。。。more
Samantha // fictionfigurine
，
I’ll have to think about this review。 This one is a bit like Eleanor Oliphant but sadder :（
Reference
google book https://www.google.com/search?tbm=bks&q=Sorrow and Bliss
hathitrust digital library https://babel.hathitrust.org/cgi/ls?q1=Sorrow and Bliss&field1=ocr&a=srchls&ft=ft&lmt=ft
The British Library https://bll01.primo.exlibrisgroup.com/discovery/search?query=any,contains,Sorrow and Bliss&tab=LibraryCatalog&search_scope=Not_BL_Suppress&vid=44BL_INST:BLL01&lang=en&offset=0