How to Sell a Haunted House
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- Create Date：2023-01-19 10:51:48
- Update Date：2025-09-07
- Status：finish
- Author：Grady Hendrix
- ISBN：0593201264
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Summary
Your past and your family can haunt you like nothing else… A hilarious and terrifying new novel from the New York Times bestselling author of The Final Girl Support Group。
Every childhood home is haunted， and each of us are possessed by our parents。
When their parents die at the tail end of the coronavirus pandemic， Louise and Mark Joyner are devastated but nothing can prepare them for how bad things are about to get。 The two siblings are almost totally estranged， and couldn’t be more different。 Now， however， they don’t have a choice but to get along。 The virus has passed， and both of them are facing bank accounts ravaged by the economic meltdown。 Their one asset？ Their childhood home。 They need to get it on the market as soon as possible because they need the money。 Yet before her parents died they taped newspaper over the mirrors and nailed shut the attic door。
Sometimes we feel like puppets， controlled by our upbringing and our genes。 Sometimes we feel like our parents treat us like toys， or playthings， or even dolls。 The past can ground us， teach us， and keep us safe。 It can also trap us， and bind us， and suffocate the life out of us。 As disturbing events stack up in the house， Louise and Mark have to learn that sometimes the only way to break away from the past， sometimes the only way to sell a haunted house， is to burn it all down。
Every childhood home is haunted， and each of us are possessed by our parents。
When their parents die at the tail end of the coronavirus pandemic， Louise and Mark Joyner are devastated but nothing can prepare them for how bad things are about to get。 The two siblings are almost totally estranged， and couldn’t be more different。 Now， however， they don’t have a choice but to get along。 The virus has passed， and both of them are facing bank accounts ravaged by the economic meltdown。 Their one asset？ Their childhood home。 They need to get it on the market as soon as possible because they need the money。 Yet before her parents died they taped newspaper over the mirrors and nailed shut the attic door。
Sometimes we feel like puppets， controlled by our upbringing and our genes。 Sometimes we feel like our parents treat us like toys， or playthings， or even dolls。 The past can ground us， teach us， and keep us safe。 It can also trap us， and bind us， and suffocate the life out of us。 As disturbing events stack up in the house， Louise and Mark have to learn that sometimes the only way to break away from the past， sometimes the only way to sell a haunted house， is to burn it all down。
Reviews
David Thomas
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KAKAWEEWEE！<\b> This is more of a 4。5 for me only because I’m comparing it to his other books and My best friends Exorcism and The SBCGSV are still my favorites but I loved this one。 I loved how the parts were broken down by the stages of grief and I also like how he played with the haunting trope。 As always Grady Hendrix is great at character development especially female characters and he’s the king of campy horror， this book is no different。 If you haven’t grabbed a copy of this one yet then KAKAWEEWEE！<\b> This is more of a 4。5 for me only because I’m comparing it to his other books and My best friends Exorcism and The SBCGSV are still my favorites but I loved this one。 I loved how the parts were broken down by the stages of grief and I also like how he played with the haunting trope。 As always Grady Hendrix is great at character development especially female characters and he’s the king of campy horror， this book is no different。 If you haven’t grabbed a copy of this one yet then what are you doing！ 。。。more
Cook Memorial Public Library
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Recommended by Mark。 Check our catalog: https://encore。cooklib。org/iii/encore。。。 Recommended by Mark。 Check our catalog: https://encore。cooklib。org/iii/encore。。。 。。。more
Chloe
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Thank you Grady Hendrix for reigniting my love of horror！ I’ve just finished how to sell a haunted house and oh my goodness！！！！！！ This book had everything， it totally tapped into my fears and scared the living daylights out of me but at the same time made me laugh and even shed a few tears。 I can’t say enough good things about this book！ Good luck to the rest of the books I read in 2023， this is going to take some beating。
Jackie
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While I love horror， haunted house stories and possessed dolls are never my favorites。 This novel， however， was REALLY fun。 When Grady Hendrix wants to， he can really entertain and write a story that holds your attention from beginning to end。 The characters are engaging and interesting and the story is great。 There`s plenty of sadness， horror， mystery and heart for everyone。 While I love horror， haunted house stories and possessed dolls are never my favorites。 This novel， however， was REALLY fun。 When Grady Hendrix wants to， he can really entertain and write a story that holds your attention from beginning to end。 The characters are engaging and interesting and the story is great。 There`s plenty of sadness， horror， mystery and heart for everyone。 。。。more
Brooke Ziegler
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How to Sell a Haunted House I listened to this on audio。 It's a little over 13 hours long。 The narration is excellent。 I must admit， the first three or four hours seemed to drag on。 I thought the arguing over the house by the siblings was repetitive。 But I appreciate Grady taking the time to let you get to know the characters and care about what happens to them。But then the story picked up， pulling me in for the rest of the story。 Overall， a pretty damn creepy， original story。 How to Sell a Haunted House I listened to this on audio。 It's a little over 13 hours long。 The narration is excellent。 I must admit， the first three or four hours seemed to drag on。 I thought the arguing over the house by the siblings was repetitive。 But I appreciate Grady taking the time to let you get to know the characters and care about what happens to them。But then the story picked up， pulling me in for the rest of the story。 Overall， a pretty damn creepy， original story。 。。。more
Adriana | nannersreads
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Thank you to Edelweiss Plus， Berkley Publishing Group， and Grady Hendrix for providing me with an eARC of this book。 This is my honest review。-Grady Hendrix does it again！ What's scarier than a haunted Ikea and selling your soul for fame？ A house haunted by the memories of your childhood， duh。 👻 Oh， and maybe your mom's creepy puppet and doll collection。 😬 Taking it back to horror basics， Hendrix delivers a morbidly comedic exploration of family， grief， and how heavily these two are intertwined。 Thank you to Edelweiss Plus， Berkley Publishing Group， and Grady Hendrix for providing me with an eARC of this book。 This is my honest review。-Grady Hendrix does it again！ What's scarier than a haunted Ikea and selling your soul for fame？ A house haunted by the memories of your childhood， duh。 👻 Oh， and maybe your mom's creepy puppet and doll collection。 😬 Taking it back to horror basics， Hendrix delivers a morbidly comedic exploration of family， grief， and how heavily these two are intertwined。-Louise and Mark aren't the easiest characters to fall in love with， but they manage to squirm their way into your heart anyway。 Generational trauma and grief will make you a prickly human being， but they also have a way of bonding you with your siblings in a way that no one else will know。 Louise and Mark are the perfect example of that。 I couldn't help but see my own family reflected in theirs and I know several people will also see themselves here。 Who knows you better than the people who have lived what you have lived？ That's both a terrifying and comforting thought。-I enjoyed this book so much。 I think my favorite part was how stripped back it was。 This is a story about a haunted house and the siblings trying to make it to the end of the story。 It reminded me of classic horror and how easy it is to be afraid of what we see every day。-If you're looking for a classic horror story， definitely give How to Sell A Haunted House a shot。 It is available in ebook， audiobook， and hardcover format。 。。。more
Rebecca
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Thanks to the publisher， via Netgalley， for an advance e-galley for honest review。That was a ride！ Creepy doll haters， this is probably not for you， but I think most scaredy cats （me！） can handle this one。 There are some absolutely breathtaking moments throughout this， and the author's note for context on what he was thinking when writing this made for some interesting thoughts throughout。 Thanks to the publisher， via Netgalley， for an advance e-galley for honest review。That was a ride！ Creepy doll haters， this is probably not for you， but I think most scaredy cats （me！） can handle this one。 There are some absolutely breathtaking moments throughout this， and the author's note for context on what he was thinking when writing this made for some interesting thoughts throughout。 。。。more
pageswithparis
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this was more of a me issue。 i tried to really enjoy this one， but i think i wasn’t into the whole puppet thing。
Jenny Mauro
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WTF did I just read？？？ This book is a delicious combination of utterly creepy mixed with humor and a sweet and satisfying side story of a family coming together。 I am not a horror fan but I read this basically in one night and could not put it down。 Glimpses of me reading this book-grabbing my chest， grabbing the sofa armrest， laughing， gasping， looking around horror struck-you get the picture。 You know you are in for a scary ride if creepy dolls and puppets are involved-trust me you will never WTF did I just read？？？ This book is a delicious combination of utterly creepy mixed with humor and a sweet and satisfying side story of a family coming together。 I am not a horror fan but I read this basically in one night and could not put it down。 Glimpses of me reading this book-grabbing my chest， grabbing the sofa armrest， laughing， gasping， looking around horror struck-you get the picture。 You know you are in for a scary ride if creepy dolls and puppets are involved-trust me you will never look at them the same after this book。 Someone needs to buy the movie rights for this now-it would become a cult classic and the spin off merchandise would sell out in a minute。 This book is everything you have come to expect from this author and so much more。 A horror story that will scare the pants off of you but ends with a smile。 So good。 。。。more
Heidi
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Quirky and unhinged。。。 in a good way。
Karen
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I kept listening though I really don’t know why。 This is super odd。
urwa
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i like two types of horror: campy-absolute batshit horror， or mysterious woman haunting a creepy house
Kayla
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Honestly such a conflicting feeling about this book because the story part was good， but I was listening to the audiobook and they gave the puppet such a screeching high pitched voice and the dialog was intentional creepy and childish I get that but it was just so unserious I was laughing instead of being shocked or scared。 I would still recommend it， maybe my rating would be higher if I acutally read it so I didn't hear the puppet voice lol。 Honestly such a conflicting feeling about this book because the story part was good， but I was listening to the audiobook and they gave the puppet such a screeching high pitched voice and the dialog was intentional creepy and childish I get that but it was just so unserious I was laughing instead of being shocked or scared。 I would still recommend it， maybe my rating would be higher if I acutally read it so I didn't hear the puppet voice lol。 。。。more
Nicole
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I loved this！ I finished it in one sitting， in the dark and was so creeped out。 I love Grady Hendrix’s writing。 I had a traumatic incident my my twin doll when I was little and have been creeped out by dolls ever since。 This hit home。 Pick this up ASAP。Siblings Louise and Mark are devastated when their parents die in a car accident。 The estranged pair haven’t gotten along going back to when they were kids。 They need to get the family home and out of each others hair as soon as possible。 Easier s I loved this！ I finished it in one sitting， in the dark and was so creeped out。 I love Grady Hendrix’s writing。 I had a traumatic incident my my twin doll when I was little and have been creeped out by dolls ever since。 This hit home。 Pick this up ASAP。Siblings Louise and Mark are devastated when their parents die in a car accident。 The estranged pair haven’t gotten along going back to when they were kids。 They need to get the family home and out of each others hair as soon as possible。 Easier said than done。 Their parents nailed the attic door shut and taped newspapers over the mirrors。 There are an insane amounts of dolls and puppets everywhere。 As disturbing events increase in the house Louise and Mark realize that they need to take drastic measures to break away from the past。How to Sell a Haunted House is available now。 。。。more
Kaila Aimino
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I think this is one of the first books I was legitimately scared while reading （and trying to run to the safety of my blankets after turning the lights off）。
Lexi Cheatham
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Definitely need to process this book for the night before giving it a review。 At some points it was giving me a 2 star read but at others it was literally blowing my mind！！！！ I don’t even know if i’d recommend it but I also loved reading it？？？？？？ official review & rating coming soon！！！
Jeremy Nielsen
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fuck them dolls man
Stephanie
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DNF 15% - you lost me at haunted dolls， it’s a deep trigger， and looking back I should have gotten that from the blurb。 Byeeee。
Kat
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I usually love a Grady Hendrix novel but the creepy dolls in this were。。。 a lot。 I did enjoy the exorcist aunties but the backstory of how the demented puppet came to be also didn't entirely add up。 The ending is okay but getting there was challenging。 I usually love a Grady Hendrix novel but the creepy dolls in this were。。。 a lot。 I did enjoy the exorcist aunties but the backstory of how the demented puppet came to be also didn't entirely add up。 The ending is okay but getting there was challenging。 。。。more
Syd Linders
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I enjoyed this book as I did Horrorstor and Southern Book Club。 My main complaint is that Hendrix once again takes a premise that could legit be thought provoking and challenge the reader and instead just makes it into a wanna-be 80s movie。 （view spoiler）[Like it feels like the puppet could be a metaphor for generational trauma。 But instead we get two chapters about Mark doing anti-war puppet shows during the Bush administration。 （hide spoiler）] At least i anticipated that going into this one a I enjoyed this book as I did Horrorstor and Southern Book Club。 My main complaint is that Hendrix once again takes a premise that could legit be thought provoking and challenge the reader and instead just makes it into a wanna-be 80s movie。 （view spoiler）[Like it feels like the puppet could be a metaphor for generational trauma。 But instead we get two chapters about Mark doing anti-war puppet shows during the Bush administration。 （hide spoiler）] At least i anticipated that going into this one and was therefore not disappointed。 。。。more
Debbie Rozier
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Just a heads up。。if dolls and puppets don’t give you the creeps right now， they will after you read this book！The title does clue you in to what this book is all about。 In addition to the scary dolls， you also get some serious family secrets， sibling rivalry and the fantastic setting of Mount Pleasant， South Carolina。This book is entertaining， dramatic， and spine-chilling。 I am very happy I read this on vacation and not in my own home because I fear I would not be sleeping for a few days。
Rachael Fryman
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One Sentence Summary: Cleaning out the creepy puppets from your dead parents' house - never a good idea。Reminds Me Of: All Hallows， Girl in the Lake， Home Before Dark， The Collector， ThornhillThree Reasons You Should Read This:1） If you like Grady Hendrix campy horror style， you will enjoy this new edition to his lineup。2） If you mess with creepy puppets and other paranormal elements in your horror， this is for you。3） Under all the camp and paranormal activity， there is a deeper message about gr One Sentence Summary: Cleaning out the creepy puppets from your dead parents' house - never a good idea。Reminds Me Of: All Hallows， Girl in the Lake， Home Before Dark， The Collector， ThornhillThree Reasons You Should Read This:1） If you like Grady Hendrix campy horror style， you will enjoy this new edition to his lineup。2） If you mess with creepy puppets and other paranormal elements in your horror， this is for you。3） Under all the camp and paranormal activity， there is a deeper message about grief and family。One Thing You Should Know Before You Pick This Up:This deals with a lot of heavy family baggage！ Lots of grief， lies， family drama， generational trauma， etc。 So just check out warnings and reviews before picking this up if you might be sensitive to this。Content Warnings:Death of a loved one， Violence， Injury， Death， Paranormal Violence， Grief， Family Trauma， Family conflict， Blood/Gore， Favorite Quote: “Sweetheart，” she said， “I once battled a warlock in Summerville。 There is nothing you can say that will shock me。”Soundtrack:The Funeral - Band of HorsesKill of the Night - Gin WigmoreDark Parts - Perfume GeniusDon't You Forget About Me - RufioBring Me to Life - EvanescenceWhat I've Done - Lincoln Park 。。。more
Wyrd Witch
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Read the full review on Signal Horizon！ Read the full review on Signal Horizon！ 。。。more
Ella （The Story Collector）
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When their parents die in a car accident， estranged siblings Louise and Mark are forced to come together to decide what to do with their parent’s belongings and their childhood home。 The land is worth a lot of money and they are keen to get the house on the market， but not until they’ve removed their mother’s vast collection of puppets and dolls。 But disturbing things start to happen in the house， and it seems that one puppet in particular doesn’t want to leave。Grady Hendrix is a really good hor When their parents die in a car accident， estranged siblings Louise and Mark are forced to come together to decide what to do with their parent’s belongings and their childhood home。 The land is worth a lot of money and they are keen to get the house on the market， but not until they’ve removed their mother’s vast collection of puppets and dolls。 But disturbing things start to happen in the house， and it seems that one puppet in particular doesn’t want to leave。Grady Hendrix is a really good horror writer。 I wouldn’t say this book is scary as such， but it is definitely creepy， atmospheric and exciting。 No time is wasted in getting things going， and the attacks start to happen almost as soon as Louise steps foot in the house after her parent’s deaths。It’s quite a traditional style haunting， but has a fresh feel when combined with Hendrix’s dark humour。 I loved how quickly Mercy identified that the house was haunted， and the rest of the families casual willingness to get involved。 It was only Louise’s resistance to the idea of a haunting that really antagonised and escalated the situation （and boy， did it ever escalate！）。 Louise’s blind resistance to the facts did get a little frustrating and repetitive at times， but the fast pace and almost constant action helped to smooth over this and keep the story moving。I received a copy of this book from the publisher in exchange for an honest review。 。。。more
Tammy
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Happy Release Day to How to Sell a Haunted House by Grady Hendrix！ Grady Hendrix’s reign of the horror novel genre continues in this new release with his brilliant style， outrageous storylines & humor， but each book is obviously different & can clearly holds its’ own。 How to Sell a Haunted House is morbid， ridiculous & outrageously horrific in that curiously entertaining， can’t-look-away type of way。 There are spooky noises， dolls， creepy messages， puppets & a haunted house， oh my。 I plan to kee Happy Release Day to How to Sell a Haunted House by Grady Hendrix！ Grady Hendrix’s reign of the horror novel genre continues in this new release with his brilliant style， outrageous storylines & humor， but each book is obviously different & can clearly holds its’ own。 How to Sell a Haunted House is morbid， ridiculous & outrageously horrific in that curiously entertaining， can’t-look-away type of way。 There are spooky noises， dolls， creepy messages， puppets & a haunted house， oh my。 I plan to keep this vague because it will create a terrifyingly captivating story。 Estranged siblings， Louise & Mark， are brought back to their childhood home when tragedy strikes their family。 Dysfunction surfaces as their opposite lives & personalities try to come together to put their parent’s home on the market。 However， their family home & the contents inside aren’t quite ready to let them go yet。 Get ready for a wild adventure as the duo attempts to survive this house First， this novel surprisingly elicited a lot of feelings out of me as I felt empathy for the horrid situation。 But then， it absolutely threw me for a loop as I truly began to understand the story & henceforth， the shock， mayhem & hilarity arrived。 I’m such of fan of the author & their fantastically vivid storytelling capabilities that play out like a movie in my head。 If you are looking for a horror novel to take you for a ride， I highly recommend How to Sell a Haunted House！Massive thanks to NetGalley & Berkley Publishing for the free arc， which I voluntarily read & reviewed。 Trigger warnings: This book mentions &/or contains death of loved ones， car accident， gore， violence & injury， 。。。more
Skye
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In true Grady Hendrix fashion this book brings the WTFs - big time。 Family drama， out-there characters and totally wild storylines - mixed with nostalgic vibes and plenty of dark humor。 Honestly， I’m not sure I fully have words for what I read - but not in a bad way。 Louise’s parents pass away in an unexpected accident and she’s tasked with returning home， sorting out the arrangements with her estranged brother Mark and going through the process of emptying her parents home to prepare it for sal In true Grady Hendrix fashion this book brings the WTFs - big time。 Family drama， out-there characters and totally wild storylines - mixed with nostalgic vibes and plenty of dark humor。 Honestly， I’m not sure I fully have words for what I read - but not in a bad way。 Louise’s parents pass away in an unexpected accident and she’s tasked with returning home， sorting out the arrangements with her estranged brother Mark and going through the process of emptying her parents home to prepare it for sale。 Scary right？ That’s not even the half of it。 The house is full of many unconventional items （handmade puppets and taxidermy squirrel nativities to name a few）…and energies？…that aren’t as sold on putting the house on the market （see what I did there？）。 This one is definitely a wild ride。 。。。more
Kayleigh Richards
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Phenomenal fabulous extraordinary piece of writing。
Emma
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All my reviews can be found at https://damppebbles。com/This time last year I was aware of horror author Grady Hendrix but I hadn’t read any of their books。 And then I picked up a copy of The Final Girl Support Group and， oh boy， I was officially smitten。 Now I have a collection of Grady Hendrix books on the bookshelf that I’m merrily working my way through （look out for my review of The Southern Book Club’s Guide to Slaying Vampires coming to the blog soon！）。 It’s safe to say the publication of All my reviews can be found at https://damppebbles。com/This time last year I was aware of horror author Grady Hendrix but I hadn’t read any of their books。 And then I picked up a copy of The Final Girl Support Group and， oh boy， I was officially smitten。 Now I have a collection of Grady Hendrix books on the bookshelf that I’m merrily working my way through （look out for my review of The Southern Book Club’s Guide to Slaying Vampires coming to the blog soon！）。 It’s safe to say the publication of a new GH book has quickly become one of my yearly reading highlights。 All in the space of a few months！ So it should come as no surprise that I jumped at the chance to read How to Sell a Haunted House。 And I loved every creepy， phobia inducing minute of it！Single parent， Louise， receives a call from her brother， Mark， informing her that their parents have died in a tragic accident。 Louise is devastated but reluctantly packs a bag， leaves her five year old daughter， Poppy， with her ex and heads to Charleston to take control of matters。 But on arrival it becomes clear to Louise that Mark is planning on doing things his own way。 Including sidelining his sister at every turn。 He’s planned the funeral and now all that’s left to do is clear out the family home so it can be sold to the highest bidder。 Mark wants no fuss or sentimentality。 But Louise feels differently。 She wants to honour the memory of her parents， taking time to sort and clear their possessions。 The house contains a lifetime of memories。 And dolls。 Dolls that seem to turn up in the most unlikely of places。 As do her mother’s homemade puppets。 Louise and Mark may be hoping for a quick sale but the house has a different idea altogether…How to Sell a Haunted House is an utterly compelling， thoroughly creepy read with exquisite characterisation which I found nigh impossible to be parted from for any length of time。 I was so drawn into Louise and Mark’s story。 I felt desperately sorry for Louise who seemed to be overlooked in favour of her younger sibling throughout their childhood， only for adult Mark to throw his toys out of the pram at the most inappropriate moment。 My blood pressure rose as Mark did everything in his power to usurp his big sister。 Removing any and all power she held at a time when emotions were raw and relationships were incredibly fragile。 But， of course， it’s only as the reader progresses through the book that we get to really understand these beautifully crafted siblings and see what lurks beneath the surface。Out of all of the horror tropes one of the scariest， for me， is the creepy ass doll。 Only mildly creepier is the haunted puppet。 There’s not much in it really but the puppet is definitely the more sinister of the two。 And How to Sell a Haunted House proves my point in abundance。 Hendrix has literally created a monster。 Part of me wanted to hide in the wardrobe from the malevolence of nasty little Pupkin。 But I couldn’t put the book down！ I was completely immersed in the horror that was happening before me and I loved every chilling moment。Would I recommend this book？ I would， yes。 How to Sell a Haunted House is my favourite Grady Hendrix novel so far， but I don’t think you can go wrong in picking up one of this author’s books。 Everything I have read to date has been thoroughly entertaining， a whole lot of fun， perfectly pitched and pretty darn memorable。 I do think， at times， the pace moved a little slower than in previous books but that’s never a problem， providing the characters speak to me。 And they certainly did！ I was swept away by the author’s clever storytelling to a world of stuffed squirrels and invisible dogs and weirdly， I didn’t want to leave。 All in all， How to Sell a Haunted House is a winner for me。 I loved the characters， I loved what the author put the characters through and I loved that it was all just a little bit bonkers， in the best way possible。 Highly recommended。 。。。more
Marc Bougharios
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When estranged siblings Louise and Mark parents die， they are forced to come together to sort out the details with their house。 A house that is not only filled with memories， but also dolls。 A lot of creepy dolls。 Dolls that may or not be out to kill you。 No one does horror-comedy like Hendrix。 On one page， you'll find yourself squealing in disgust， and then on the next， you'll be laughing。 It's such a hard thing to balance， but he really is a master of his craft and this book displays that。I lo When estranged siblings Louise and Mark parents die， they are forced to come together to sort out the details with their house。 A house that is not only filled with memories， but also dolls。 A lot of creepy dolls。 Dolls that may or not be out to kill you。 No one does horror-comedy like Hendrix。 On one page， you'll find yourself squealing in disgust， and then on the next， you'll be laughing。 It's such a hard thing to balance， but he really is a master of his craft and this book displays that。I loved the relationship between the two siblings， and watching them deal with their grief in their own ways。 This isn't only a horror story， it's one about families， and the secrets we keep hidden。 It's heartbreaking， heartwarming， funny， and of course， scary。 I'm sure that after reading this， you'll never see a doll the same ever again。 Thank you to Penguin Random House and Berkley for sending me an advanced copy of this novel in exchange for my honest review。 。。。more
Runalong
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