When the Body Says No: Exploring the Stress-Disease Connection
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- Create Date：2021-04-01 12:00:11
- Update Date：2025-09-06
- Status：finish
- Author：Gabor Maté
- ISBN：178504222X
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Summary
Can a person literally die of loneliness？ Is there a connection between the ability to express emotions and Alzheimer’s disease？ Is there such a thing as a ‘cancer personality’？
Drawing on deep scientific research and Dr Gabor Maté’s acclaimed clinical work， When the Body Says No provides the answers to critical questions about the mind-body link – and the role that stress and our emotional makeup play in an array of common diseases。
When the Body Says No:
- Explores the role of the mind-body link in conditions and diseases such as arthritis， cancer， diabetes， heart disease， irritable bowel syndrome and multiple sclerosis。
- Shares dozens of enlightening case studies and stories， including those of people such as Lou Gehrig （ALS）， Betty Ford （breast cancer）， Ronald Reagan （Alzheimer’s）， Gilda Radner （ovarian cancer） and Lance Armstrong （testicular cancer）
- Reveals ‘The Seven A’s of Healing’: principles in healing and the prevention of illness from hidden stress
Drawing on deep scientific research and Dr Gabor Maté’s acclaimed clinical work， When the Body Says No provides the answers to critical questions about the mind-body link – and the role that stress and our emotional makeup play in an array of common diseases。
When the Body Says No:
- Explores the role of the mind-body link in conditions and diseases such as arthritis， cancer， diabetes， heart disease， irritable bowel syndrome and multiple sclerosis。
- Shares dozens of enlightening case studies and stories， including those of people such as Lou Gehrig （ALS）， Betty Ford （breast cancer）， Ronald Reagan （Alzheimer’s）， Gilda Radner （ovarian cancer） and Lance Armstrong （testicular cancer）
- Reveals ‘The Seven A’s of Healing’: principles in healing and the prevention of illness from hidden stress
Reviews
Amanda
，
3。5 stars。 Interesting premise。 There's still so much we don't know about how long-term stress affects the body。 3。5 stars。 Interesting premise。 There's still so much we don't know about how long-term stress affects the body。 。。。more
Junayd M
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Meant to finish this is 2 weeks。 Didn’t happen。I think that this book was aimed at middle aged men and women who are suffering from chronic diseases but I guess I read it before that happens。Gabor Mate very skilfully intertwines his personal experience and professional anecdotal evidence with scientific studies and understanding of the human body and mind。 This approach gives the book a very approachable aspect。 It lies between a scientific paper and a bloggers book based primarily on “motivatio Meant to finish this is 2 weeks。 Didn’t happen。I think that this book was aimed at middle aged men and women who are suffering from chronic diseases but I guess I read it before that happens。Gabor Mate very skilfully intertwines his personal experience and professional anecdotal evidence with scientific studies and understanding of the human body and mind。 This approach gives the book a very approachable aspect。 It lies between a scientific paper and a bloggers book based primarily on “motivational speaking” and a “you can do it，” attitude。He quite subtly criticises the pharmaceutical industry for their ignoring of the holistic approach to healing。 Gabor Maté talks about a vast range of chronic diseases but it’s interesting he doesn’t talk about Depression and other mental disorders and how they are caused by childhood trauma and neglect。I think it was very important how he addresses the danger of over positive thinking and the need for acknowledging traumatic and negative affects。While it may seem like he didn’t really offer any advice I think that this was probably a good thing。 By not giving advice which people may cling to as gospel Maté realises that each individual needs a different approach and to try and dispense mental exercises through a book could cause more harm then good。A few take aways from this book:1。 Chronic illness is caused by chronic stresses in out environment which can be mental as well as physical。2。 What we learn as children affects how we see the world and how we teach our own children to see life3。 Having a seemingly positive childhood does not mean you haven’t experienced trauma and you have to have a critical look at life。4。 Having a strong social support network reduces the chances of developing and dying to chronic illnesses。5。 A critical part of being human to express our selves creatively 6。 Chronic diseases being caused by stress and anxiety is not the fault of the patient but the result of systems spanning generations 7。 In order to heal and understand disease we have to acknowledge that the brain and our thoughts have a physical affects on our bodies and that the way we regulate our bodies is based off of our physical environment， hormonal levels and mental health。Thanks for reading and hope you find this book as useful as I did。 。。。more
Ashleigh
，
I read the American version of this book “when the body says no: exploring the stress- disease connection”I heard Mate speak at a conference and fell in love。 I love the message of this book and found it helpful to apply to my medical social worker job。 I will say， the book is hard to read and I probably wouldn’t have finished it if I weren’t in a book club with a coworker。
Rachel
，
This book really resonated with me， not just because I know first-hand how stress can affect the body， but because the focus on how people cope with their emotions is relatable in almost any context。 I liked the anecdotal sections of the book much more than the data-driven sections， so I’m not taking the analyses as gospel at all， but I think the mind-body connection is certainly worth focusing on and the author did a great job incorporating this into a more nuanced view of illness and disease。 This book really resonated with me， not just because I know first-hand how stress can affect the body， but because the focus on how people cope with their emotions is relatable in almost any context。 I liked the anecdotal sections of the book much more than the data-driven sections， so I’m not taking the analyses as gospel at all， but I think the mind-body connection is certainly worth focusing on and the author did a great job incorporating this into a more nuanced view of illness and disease。 The structure in general was lacking a bit， and loses a star from me because I just find these types of reads a bit of a chore （even when I enjoy them）。 。。。more
Penny Harper
，
Very accessible to read for a non-scientist， albeit a bit dry in places。 It took me a long time to read， and I'm a superfast reader。 The emotional link to illness is pretty obvious when you think about it （but hardly touched upon in conventional medicine）， although I couldn't help wondering if the conclusions Mate draws are a bit simplistic - those with ALS are too nice， those with cancer repress their emotions， those with rheumatoid arthritis are people-pleasers， etc。 As one in two of us will g Very accessible to read for a non-scientist， albeit a bit dry in places。 It took me a long time to read， and I'm a superfast reader。 The emotional link to illness is pretty obvious when you think about it （but hardly touched upon in conventional medicine）， although I couldn't help wondering if the conclusions Mate draws are a bit simplistic - those with ALS are too nice， those with cancer repress their emotions， those with rheumatoid arthritis are people-pleasers， etc。 As one in two of us will get cancer， does that mean that half of us repress our emotions？ However， he obviously knows a lot more about it than me， so I'll shut up :） It was great to have the stress-cortisol-nervous system-illness interaction explained properly。 And basically， we all need to attend to our own needs more， and speak up when something is bothering us。 That seems to be it in a nutshell。 Oh， and the most important thing is feeling that you were loved as a child。 Love always seems to be the crux of the matter。。。 。。。more
Barbara Lenkei
，
I’ve been an avid Gabor Mate YouTube talks listener for a very long time， and I always found his thought processes and outlooks incredibly interesting and stimulating。 Through this book I was able to understand all his ideas in so much more depth， and it honestly has changed my life。 Although I felt like the target audience of this book was probably higher than my young age of eighteen， I was able to learn so much about myself and my relationship with my parents， and how my childhood experiences I’ve been an avid Gabor Mate YouTube talks listener for a very long time， and I always found his thought processes and outlooks incredibly interesting and stimulating。 Through this book I was able to understand all his ideas in so much more depth， and it honestly has changed my life。 Although I felt like the target audience of this book was probably higher than my young age of eighteen， I was able to learn so much about myself and my relationship with my parents， and how my childhood experiences have shaped me into who I am。Officially my favourite book ever。 Thank you Gabor。 。。。more
Duygu
，
İlk sayfalarında oldukça zorlandım ancak ilerleyen bölümlerde tetiklendigim beni daha çok içine çeken yerler oldu。 Kitabın savı sağlığın üç temele dayandığı; beden， zihin ve spiritüel bağlantı。 Verdiği örnekler ile de destekleniyor bu sav kitap boyu。 Bazı bölümler biyolojik tıbbi açıklamalar sebebi ile zorlayabilir ancak bence muhakkak okunması gereken kitaplar arasında。
Jen
，
Interesting concepts。 Terrifying results。
Liliana Kiss
，
I took my time reading and digesting many ideas from this book， it's so good。 It's written in an easy to understand way， for a non-medical reader。 We all know stress is why many of us get sick， either with a chronic disease or not。 But I never realized how deep stress effects can go。 One of the main ideas that stuck with me is about anger and how much damage anger can cause us if we inhibit it， if we don't learn how to handle it and manage it。 Especially for women。 We grow up learning and thinki I took my time reading and digesting many ideas from this book， it's so good。 It's written in an easy to understand way， for a non-medical reader。 We all know stress is why many of us get sick， either with a chronic disease or not。 But I never realized how deep stress effects can go。 One of the main ideas that stuck with me is about anger and how much damage anger can cause us if we inhibit it， if we don't learn how to handle it and manage it。 Especially for women。 We grow up learning and thinking that it's not ok to get angry and an angry person is never going to be liked and loved。 And if we're angry we're labelled b#tches or c#nts。 So we learn to suppress any anger， because we all want to be liked。 And that's one toxic belief & behavior。 I'm glad I read this book before I have children， I learned why it's really important to heal wounds before starting new families。 To break the bad pattern and help a future generation grow up with better strategies when it comes to emotions and stress。 Just like the book about the human brain， Gabor Mate also references the orphan children from Romania， who have been deprived of human contact and connection。 And highlights why it's important and vital for a child to be touched and cared for in the first year of life。 This idea contradicts completely the popular belief that a mother should 't hold her child in her arms too much， because the child will be spoiled。 And I think the only reason why that belief appeared is because our forefathers didn't have the time to care for an infant as they were struggling to survive。 Anyway， a wonderful book and I highly recommend it to anyone who wants to learn more about stress， trauma and chronic diseases。 。。。more
Nina
，
An eye-opening book， a must read。
Ralu
，
It is generally acknowledged that treating an effect will not solve the cause。 The answer must be sought in our depths， especially in childhood。 I understood the medium-term effects of stress， repressed emotions， anger， anxiety。 But I also understood what their cause is and exactly where someone should start a journey when they are face to face with a particular diagnosis。 But first， when we receive the signals from our body we should stop treating ourselves superficially and take care of ourse It is generally acknowledged that treating an effect will not solve the cause。 The answer must be sought in our depths， especially in childhood。 I understood the medium-term effects of stress， repressed emotions， anger， anxiety。 But I also understood what their cause is and exactly where someone should start a journey when they are face to face with a particular diagnosis。 But first， when we receive the signals from our body we should stop treating ourselves superficially and take care of ourselves。 Otherwise the body will say it for us。 If a famous psysician came to these conclusions as a result of many years of practice， research， studies， why can't we accept that a pill will not solve our problems？ 。 。。。more
Cristina Severin
，
Liked it for the holistic approach on one's health， seriously recognizing the role of emotions and stress and mind-body relation （ which is really no fresh news but it is good to hear from a doctor） I found it hard to read however， as a person with no medical education some chapters contained a lot of medical details。Also there are a lot of distressing stories about people with chronic diseases which is hard and tiring to process emotionally chapter after chapter。Some ideas were interesting， esp Liked it for the holistic approach on one's health， seriously recognizing the role of emotions and stress and mind-body relation （ which is really no fresh news but it is good to hear from a doctor） I found it hard to read however， as a person with no medical education some chapters contained a lot of medical details。Also there are a lot of distressing stories about people with chronic diseases which is hard and tiring to process emotionally chapter after chapter。Some ideas were interesting， especially about gut having it's own nervous system and others， but the main idea is repetitive and writing style too dry。I'm sure everyone have problems and can relate at least with some patterns of behaviour described in the book， but I was not fully convinced by the author on his arguments that all problems originates from emotional repression， childhood and chronic stress， as we all experience these and somehow not everyone ends up with cancer。I feel that it is still groud for many researches to come 。。。more
Tara
，
This is a fascinating book on the connection between stress and chronic disease。 The author hypothesizes that an individual develops unhealthy coping mechanisms in childhood that they then use repeatedly throughout their lifetime。 This results in physiological changes in the body that may contribute to disease。 The author backs up his theory with anecdotal patient case studies， published research， and fact-based scientific explanations。I would have given this book 5 stars， just for being the ver This is a fascinating book on the connection between stress and chronic disease。 The author hypothesizes that an individual develops unhealthy coping mechanisms in childhood that they then use repeatedly throughout their lifetime。 This results in physiological changes in the body that may contribute to disease。 The author backs up his theory with anecdotal patient case studies， published research， and fact-based scientific explanations。I would have given this book 5 stars， just for being the very rare science book that I couldn’t put down。 I decided to only rate it 4 stars because the author doesn’t really discuss whether or not the resulting disease states are reversible， or provide practical suggestions on how to become aware of and change the ingrained coping mechanisms。 Also， the book ends kind of abruptly and would have benefitted from a concluding chapter。 。。。more
Geta
，
I believe in the idea that stress and all it's consequences play a big role in how a person feels fizically。But to go beyond that and extrapolate the idea that every sickness is caused primarily by stress is an exageration in my opinion。 At some point in the book it says that a person who had trauma as a child or had anxiety or did not express his/her feelings is a good candidate to get sick。 Well， point me to a person who does not fit at least one criteria from above。 I believe in the idea that stress and all it's consequences play a big role in how a person feels fizically。But to go beyond that and extrapolate the idea that every sickness is caused primarily by stress is an exageration in my opinion。 At some point in the book it says that a person who had trauma as a child or had anxiety or did not express his/her feelings is a good candidate to get sick。 Well， point me to a person who does not fit at least one criteria from above。 。。。more
Norepinephrine
，
Decent narrative that makes you aware of your everyday decisions and how they might affect your health in the long run。 However， after a few chapters you will realize that every chapter is the same and may lose interest。
Angela Son
，
4，5 stars， such an impressive book！
Lo
，
It is amazing how repressed emotions， anxiety and stress can produce so much dis ease。 Thoroughly recommend this book。
Daphne
，
This book will leave an indelible mark on me， together with Jacqueline du Pré's Elgar Cello Concerto which I listened to on repeat while reading。。。 I know， not dramatic at all！ I came to this book while experiencing burnout。 My twenties were spent hurling myself into the fullest life， in many ways outpacing childhood trauma and dysfunctional relationships。 In my thirties， the traumas and anxieties are dragging me down far more than I'd anticipated。 It's dawned on me what's going on inside， readi This book will leave an indelible mark on me， together with Jacqueline du Pré's Elgar Cello Concerto which I listened to on repeat while reading。。。 I know， not dramatic at all！ I came to this book while experiencing burnout。 My twenties were spent hurling myself into the fullest life， in many ways outpacing childhood trauma and dysfunctional relationships。 In my thirties， the traumas and anxieties are dragging me down far more than I'd anticipated。 It's dawned on me what's going on inside， reading this book。 It's also been jarring to understand how predictable some of the stress is given the broad contours of my life - and how critical it is to change course before it's too late。Gabor Maté， a physician and survivor of the Nazi genocide， writes with great humanity about the dance between psychology and physiology， drawing on the field of psychoneuroimmunology。 All too often we think about emotions as separate from our bodies; so much of modern medicine treats them in siloes。 Yet as Maté shows， emotions heavily influence how our immune system and major organs function through electrical， chemical， and hormonal discharges - much of it boiling down to the HPA （hypothalamus， pituary， and adrenal gland） axis。Maté illustrates through various cases and studies the high correlation between disease and repression of anger， or inability to say no。 The lack of emotional competence and ability to set boundaries - often expressed as niceness， empathy， desire to please through perfectionism， and self-sacrifice - accumulates over a lifetime as emotional repression。 Such tendencies are often seeded through key relationships with loved ones。 When parents are stressed or harbor unresolved anxiety / unmet emotional needs， children are also more likely to exhibit depressive behaviors and fears of abandonment。 Women and caretakers are also especially susceptible to stress and poorer immune response。 This can lead not only to depression， but raise the risk of cancer， ALS， Alzheimer's， multiple sclerosis （Jacqueline du Pré's case）， and other autoimmune diseases。Reading this book raises big questions about whether it's possible to break out of the cycle of anxiety and chronic stress for myself， my mom， and my potential future kids - and how much I should throw into nurturing loved ones and the planet / society vs。 myself in this marathon of life。 I will be gentler on myself going forward， that's for sure！ I recommend this book for just about anyone whether you or loved ones are navigating stress - especially during COVID。 。。。more
Inna Volvak
，
While the link between the suppressed negative emotions like anger and our immune system is explained in great details， it is still not very clear from the book what can be done to reveal and purge those suppressed emotions， especially if they were suppressed in infancy and cannot be counciously recalled。Also， sometimes I felt that the evidence was slim: while some people really suffered great abuses， other people in his stories suffered only some relatively minor stressors and still ended up wi While the link between the suppressed negative emotions like anger and our immune system is explained in great details， it is still not very clear from the book what can be done to reveal and purge those suppressed emotions， especially if they were suppressed in infancy and cannot be counciously recalled。Also， sometimes I felt that the evidence was slim: while some people really suffered great abuses， other people in his stories suffered only some relatively minor stressors and still ended up with a disease。 So， where is the fine line？ Noone is perfect， there are no perfect parents， to it is always possible to find some stressors in anyone's life， so， why some people end up with diseases and others do not？ 。。。more
Annie Taal
，
（4。5 ⭐） This may not be the book to have picked up during a health flare， but my random book selection may have also been pointing me in the right direction。 While this is book is very wordy and chocked full of science lingo and jargon this stories and way it is woven together sucks you in。 I do wish there had been a bit more focus on solutions but overall a great read。 Fall Reading Challenge Book 14/20: About Time - A book you have been meaning to read
Claire Willeford-Carrillo
，
An incredibly useful tool as I continue to understand all the indelible connections among our physical selves， spiritual selves， emotional selves， and the world/ universe at large。。。 great read
Jonathan Northcote
，
Very insightful and interesting。
Emily
，
An insightful and informative book on important it is to learn how to say no and to realize that it's okay to put you and your body first。 What I especially found interesting was its emphasis on holistic health and balance - that our psychology， emotions and thoughts are all interconnected with our body's physiology and how we should also look at all factors （ie。 not just genetics but one's relationships， the emotional interaction between child-parent growing up， family upbringing， etc） when it An insightful and informative book on important it is to learn how to say no and to realize that it's okay to put you and your body first。 What I especially found interesting was its emphasis on holistic health and balance - that our psychology， emotions and thoughts are all interconnected with our body's physiology and how we should also look at all factors （ie。 not just genetics but one's relationships， the emotional interaction between child-parent growing up， family upbringing， etc） when it comes to potential risk factors for disease。 It also touched upon the importance of knowing how to regulate and release anger in a healthy way， rather than bottling it up or acting out aggressively。 We all know that stress is a silent killer and that it wears down on our immune system， but to read case studies of patients that he worked with was super eye opening。 This book will definitely stay with me for quite some time。 A collection of some of my favourite quotes:1） 'We need to foster emotional competence in our children， as the best preventative medicine。2） 'Health rests on three pillars: the body， the psyche， and the spiritual connection。 To ignore any one of them is to invite imbalance and disease'3） 'Somehow people are trained - some more than others - into unknowingly taking care of other people's emotional needs and minimizing their own。 They hide their pain and sadness even from themselves。'4） 'The inability to process and express feelings effectively and a tendency to serve the needs of others before even considering one's own， are common patterns in people who develop chronic illness。'5） 'If we gain the ability to look into ourselves with honesty， compassion， and with unclouded vision， we can identify the ways we need to take care of ourselves。 We can see the areas of the self formerly hidden in the dark。' 。。。more
Katsmewsings
，
Dr。 Gabor Mate is an absolute gem。 Incredible work， but very cerebral at times。 I didn’t get through the whole book in my first library hold， so I had to re-request it and wait a while to get it back。 Glad I finally finished it。
Jenny Rae
，
this was great。 struck a good balance between anecdotal and informative。
Mar
，
The book is decent enough， but I was hoping for more solutions for dealing with stress。 The book outlines how stress can manifest itself in various diseases such as cancer， ALS， Alzheimer's etc。 The author uses his practice as a Dr。 to give many examples of patients who've experienced the impact of stress in a variety of ways which definitely adds to the book's readability。 However， I'm already convinced stress takes a toll。 Only the last chapter gives some suggestions for those dealing with str The book is decent enough， but I was hoping for more solutions for dealing with stress。 The book outlines how stress can manifest itself in various diseases such as cancer， ALS， Alzheimer's etc。 The author uses his practice as a Dr。 to give many examples of patients who've experienced the impact of stress in a variety of ways which definitely adds to the book's readability。 However， I'm already convinced stress takes a toll。 Only the last chapter gives some suggestions for those dealing with stress， but they're cursory and I wish more of the book had been devoted to these seven items。 。。。more
Jennifer O'Kelly
，
It's relatively common in books about counselling/psychology/psychotherapy to find claims of links between emotional difficulties and physical health。 This is something I'm generally wary about。 I'm acutely aware that those of us who train in these disciplines are not medically qualified and these claims are often ill-substantiated。 On the other hand， I'm also aware that the scientific method is not all， that other forms of knowledge and insight have truth and value。 The line is a tricky one to It's relatively common in books about counselling/psychology/psychotherapy to find claims of links between emotional difficulties and physical health。 This is something I'm generally wary about。 I'm acutely aware that those of us who train in these disciplines are not medically qualified and these claims are often ill-substantiated。 On the other hand， I'm also aware that the scientific method is not all， that other forms of knowledge and insight have truth and value。 The line is a tricky one to tread。I can't attest to the medical/scientific accuracy of this book。 What I can say is that it parses it's claims very carefully， in a way that assuages most of my discomfort around these kinds of assertions。 It is written by a medical doctor， which， far from guaranteeing infallibility， at least lends it more credence than such claims made by those without a medical background。 It distinguishes between contributing factors and causation。 It goes to great lengths to address and dispell the implication of blame。 I found it powerful， compelling and empathetic， with a tone that implies understanding and illumination rather than a wish to scare。 While it didn't scare me， it did set alight some gentle sparks of recognition， finding myself and people I love in many of the emotional tendencies detailed。 This connected with part of me that really already knew that much of what we do cannot be good for us。 We are not entirely cerebral beings。 Anyone who has ever had a panic attack can attest to the physicality with which feeling can manifest。 We feel our emotions in our bodies and when we contort and trap them there， I don't truly believe this is likely to come without any physical consequence。 The result of reading and thinking about this has not been to make me turn on myself for any failings or to feel afraid。 In fact， it makes me want to be gentler with myself， to be attentive to what has happened and is happening for me emotionally and take the care that needs to be taken towards myself as best as I can。 。。。more
Brigitte
，
The information in this book was painfully difficult to read。 It really made me pause and consider how best to move forward。 I’m not 100% sold on everything presented （I do see value in the genome project）， but it definitely has made me think about what changes I need to put in place for my own good。
Irina Toma
，
It’s intuitive that physical illness， particularly chronic affections but not only， are the symptom rather than the phenomenon itself。 This book connects the psychological dimension with its physical expression and clinically reveals how a set of circumstances， life events and trauma may lead to sickness。 A thought provoking book on how resolving childhood traumas can address otherwise lethal diseases。
Leanne Petrin
，