The Advice Trap: Be Humble, Stay Curious & Change the Way You Lead Forever
- Downloads：6662
- Type：Epub+TxT+PDF+Mobi
- Create Date：2022-09-04 06:58:27
- Update Date：2025-09-07
- Status：finish
- Author：Michael Bungay Stanier
- ISBN：1989025757
- Environment：PC/Android/iPhone/iPad/Kindle
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Summary
From the author of the runaway bestseller The Coaching Habit comes an authoritative guide to getting the most out of your workforce—and it all starts with curbing your urge to dole out advice。 In The Advice Trap， bestselling author， speaker， and leadership coach Michael Bungay Stanier shares his invaluable insights into developing team members’ professional performance， using tips that even the busiest managers can put into play。
Learn how to confront and quell the three advice monsters that lurk inside us all， and how to resist the seven temptations that can ensnare even the most well-meaning manager。 With his trademark wit and wisdom， Michael shows you exactly how to ask questions that drive impact and engagement， eliminate the negative and accentuate the positive。 He takes you through examples of common problem situations， and reveals how to overcome them by using his everyday coaching tips。 Finally， he shows you how to attain the highest level of engagement with his “blackbelt” tools of employee interaction: transparency， lightness and deep appreciation。
A companion to The Coaching Habit， The Advice Trap gives you the power to say less， ask more—and change how you lead forever。
Learn how to confront and quell the three advice monsters that lurk inside us all， and how to resist the seven temptations that can ensnare even the most well-meaning manager。 With his trademark wit and wisdom， Michael shows you exactly how to ask questions that drive impact and engagement， eliminate the negative and accentuate the positive。 He takes you through examples of common problem situations， and reveals how to overcome them by using his everyday coaching tips。 Finally， he shows you how to attain the highest level of engagement with his “blackbelt” tools of employee interaction: transparency， lightness and deep appreciation。
A companion to The Coaching Habit， The Advice Trap gives you the power to say less， ask more—and change how you lead forever。
Reviews
Nouf Aloudah
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I was in deep need for this book。 It helps
Elizabeth
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Great， quick read for anyone trying to improve their conversation and/or leadership skills。
Jessica
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Love the free quiz and resources included on the website！
Erdenebaatar
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Зөвлөгөө өгөх гэж бүү яар
Vlad Radulescu
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O carte despre leadership și coaching。 Prima idee importantă pe care am notat-o este extrasă din rezumatul cărții "Coaching zi de zi" （"Capcană sfaturilor" este o continuare a cărții "Coaching zi de zi" （scrisă de același autor）， iar autorul realizează un scurt rezumat al cărții anterioare pentru a apela la niște idei utile）。 Sunt detaliate cele trei sfaturi （principii） pe care ar trebui să te bazezi， dacă vrei să fii un coach （aș folosi mai mult termenul: mentor） penru cei din jur: "Fii leneș， O carte despre leadership și coaching。 Prima idee importantă pe care am notat-o este extrasă din rezumatul cărții "Coaching zi de zi" （"Capcană sfaturilor" este o continuare a cărții "Coaching zi de zi" （scrisă de același autor）， iar autorul realizează un scurt rezumat al cărții anterioare pentru a apela la niște idei utile）。 Sunt detaliate cele trei sfaturi （principii） pe care ar trebui să te bazezi， dacă vrei să fii un coach （aș folosi mai mult termenul: mentor） penru cei din jur: "Fii leneș， Fii curios， Fii consecvent！"。 Evident， nu este vorba să fii leneș în adevăratul sens al cuvântului。O altă idee interesantă este metafora folosită de autorul Michael Bungay Stanier în a explică diferite tipuri de capcane în care putem cădea când vine vorba să dăm sfaturi sau recomandări celor din jur。 Aici folosește metafora "Monstru" și îl împarte în trei categorii: Monstrul Spune， Monstrul Salvează și Monstrul Controlează。 Regăsesc trăsături din cei trei monștri în comportamentul meu， uneori。La capitolul "minusuri"， am de notat următoarele:- Este o carte schematizată， cu multe pagini în care sunt scrise doar câteva cuvinte;- Nu rămâi cu prea multe idei;- Autorul are tendita să facă trimiteri frecvente către site-urile sale unde ai putea găsi mai multe informații。 。。。more
Michael Jones
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This， to my way of thinking， is the book giving you the practice and practical application for the principles set out in Stanier's earlier book， The Coaching Habit。 I definitely recommend reading them in that order。The Advice Trap takes you through the process of how to put Stanier's coaching habits into practice。 It is， to some extent， a workbook。 But， there are additional nuances and reflections not found in the first book， so this is not mere repetition by any means。It is also a companion to This， to my way of thinking， is the book giving you the practice and practical application for the principles set out in Stanier's earlier book， The Coaching Habit。 I definitely recommend reading them in that order。The Advice Trap takes you through the process of how to put Stanier's coaching habits into practice。 It is， to some extent， a workbook。 But， there are additional nuances and reflections not found in the first book， so this is not mere repetition by any means。It is also a companion to the course - The Coaching Habit - and I happen to be reading it at the same time that I am taking the class。 That turned out to be a good idea。 In fact， if you could finish both books just before you take the class， even better。 But， not to worry， both the course and the books stand on their own。 You do not have to read the books and take the course。 However， I am glad I did。Not only does the author give us some additional insight， he also reframes things in a way that helps the learning and memory process。 And， as a bonus， there are many new sources of information that he put in this second book - including an update to his great book recommendations。So， whether you are trying to be a better coach， a better manager， a better spouse， a better parent， or a better board member。。。this book and the previous book are a pair of great resources。Enjoy！！ 。。。more
Sam Dunbabin
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Perfectly TimesMichael surprises with timely， precise and warm advice。I am a better coach just by speaking to myself already。 Recommend to any person wishing to slow down and be more effective。
Ruben Cools
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Great book。 Not just about how to lead but basically about how to communicate better as a human being。
Lindsay Previdi
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A must read！！ The perfect succinct way to work on being a better leader。 If only the behavior change was easy！！ So many great additional resources。
Virginia
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recommended by Saundra Davis
Anum
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Dig a little deeper before you give advice。
Dani Morrow
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This was my “getting ready in the morning” audio book for the last few weeks。 I liked it！ It was a good book to listen to right before beginning each work day。 The irony of a book， providing advice about how to not give advice， was not lost here！ Lol。 To summarize: shut up and listen。
Virgita Atigriv
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A must read for every person。 Main takeaway - stay more curious in a conversation and let the other person think， reflect and find his/her own best advice。
Thomas Chapman
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I found "The Coaching Habit" much more engaging and meaningful， but I got a lot out of this one as well。 Good author， meaningful subject， succinct and to-the-point writing。 I found "The Coaching Habit" much more engaging and meaningful， but I got a lot out of this one as well。 Good author， meaningful subject， succinct and to-the-point writing。 。。。more
Purposefully
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So simple， so fun， and so insightful。 Keeping this one nearby to reread and practice。
Anu Sant
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Loved it。 Finished it in one day。 Very relevant and useful information
Andreea Chiuaru
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Spre deosebire de prima lui carte （Coaching zi de zi） care doar mi-a confirmat lucruri pe care le stiam， aceasta mi-a placut mult mai mult。 M-am regasit adesea în „monstruleții” Spune， Salvează și Controlează。
Steve Long
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Decent summary of coaching skills and awareness around avoiding giving unwanted advice。
Maggie Mattmiller
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So helpful for growing in my job！ Listened to the audiobook from the library but will be buying a copy to have！
Gale Moreland
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What is your favorite quote from the book？“Once you can see it， you can dance with it。 If you don’t see it， you will simply be leD through the dance。 “ This is referring to the urge to give advice but it true。y can refer anything。 Listen to learn amd understand rather than imposing our opinions。Which coworker would you recommend this book to？Everyone。 This can help in any relationship。 Parents， spouse， boss， mentorWhat is a specific real world application that you will be able to make from what What is your favorite quote from the book？“Once you can see it， you can dance with it。 If you don’t see it， you will simply be leD through the dance。 “ This is referring to the urge to give advice but it true。y can refer anything。 Listen to learn amd understand rather than imposing our opinions。Which coworker would you recommend this book to？Everyone。 This can help in any relationship。 Parents， spouse， boss， mentorWhat is a specific real world application that you will be able to make from what you learned in this book？When you are in a position of leader ship or power it is easy to default into an advice giving mode。 The best way to combat that is to shift the focus from you to the person you are speaking with or interacting with。 When you focus on you it’s about what you can contribute and how you can help。 When the focus is on them it’s essentially what Donald Miller talks about enabling people to be their own hero。 We assume we know what the desired outcome is but how could we if we’re not even listening。 We’re not meeting people where they’re at。 We are assuming that they are where we either believe them to be or we believe they should be。What is the one thing that you think you will do differently or think differently about since you read the book？This is so hard because I know what I should be doing but it’s so easy to fall back into the habit of answering the question that was asked or giving the advice to the problem presented to you or that you see。 The part where he says that your are to tame the advice monster rather than get rid of it。 He understands you can never get rid of that urge to give advice。 I think I am going to be more aware of my default and work to give people space by asking questions and listening rather than assuming they actually need or want my adviceWhat is one point you disagreed with， or at least questioned， in this book？I mean， everyone thinks her advice is really great and I think for a lot of people it will be frustrating when they’re not given a straight answer because they’re not used to having to work through problems and selves or maybe they are too lazy to work through the problems。 It’s not really a disagreement with him but I see it as being a problem。 This type of mindset could frustrate a lot of people especially at first。How does something you learned from this book tie into one of the core values of the company？I think this actually ties into authenticity。 If you’re giving advice then you were pressuring people into being what you believe they should be or what you think they are。 Giving someone space to come up with their own solution by simply asking questions and help them work through it themselves is actually allowing them to be more authentically who they would be if they weren’t pressured into what they believe their boss wants them to be。 。。。more
David Baldwin
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I used to get mad when people would ask my advice and not take it。 Now I know why and how I should hold off just a bit longer before offering my advice。 Clients beware。
Jacob
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This was a helpful read。 It was a sort of “part two” to the author’s book “The Coaching Habit” and at times felt a bit like a re-tread。 But I might only be saying that because I just read the other volume a few weeks prior。 A few nuggets were especially helpful including the three types of advice monsters。 But I did feel myself wandering as I read with this book more than the other。I’ll certainly refer back to the material; but if you can only read one of the author’s two books， I’d recommend Th This was a helpful read。 It was a sort of “part two” to the author’s book “The Coaching Habit” and at times felt a bit like a re-tread。 But I might only be saying that because I just read the other volume a few weeks prior。 A few nuggets were especially helpful including the three types of advice monsters。 But I did feel myself wandering as I read with this book more than the other。I’ll certainly refer back to the material; but if you can only read one of the author’s two books， I’d recommend The Coaching Habit first。 。。。more
Ric Raftis
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Really good follow up on The Coaching Habit。 A book of reinforcement you might say to really drill it into you that curiousity is all-important in coaching。 So much from the Coaching Habit is revisited but in a way that presents it differently。 I was still highlighting many passages in the book for later review。 A really good read， but make sure you read The Coaching Habit first。 There you go！ I just gave you some advice。 LOL。
Lynette
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This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers。 To view it， click here。 The best leaders don’t have the answer， they ask you questions to help you self discover the answers you need。
Nayalia Parry
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This book changes the way you interact with persons， builds your communication skills， enhances your effectiveness in getting your point across and teaches you how to be more influential。
Whitney
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This was a good book for me as an instructional coach。 It was also good for me as a leader in my department。 I will be implementing quite a few of these ideas into my own practice。 My only drawback is that it became quite repetetive。
Mara Vernon
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I listened to this book and it's a helpful template for moving from advice to curiosity。 Having the hard copy would be useful reference for the tools provided in the book。 The 7 coaching questions are also covered in this book as review from his first book。 “The Kickstart Question: “What’s on your mind？” A perfect way to start many conversations。 Both open and focusing at the same time。 The AWE Question: “And what else？” The best coaching question in the world—because their first answer is never I listened to this book and it's a helpful template for moving from advice to curiosity。 Having the hard copy would be useful reference for the tools provided in the book。 The 7 coaching questions are also covered in this book as review from his first book。 “The Kickstart Question: “What’s on your mind？” A perfect way to start many conversations。 Both open and focusing at the same time。 The AWE Question: “And what else？” The best coaching question in the world—because their first answer is never their only answer， and rarely their best answer。 The Focus Question: “What’s the real challenge here for you？” We’re all wasting too much time and effort solving the wrong problem because we were seduced into thinking the first challenge is the real challenge。 The Foundation Question: “What do you want？” This is where motivated and informed action best begins。 The Strategy Question: “If you’re saying Yes to this， what must you say No to？” Strategy is about courageous choice， and this question makes commitment and opportunity cost absolutely clear。 The Lazy Question: “How can I help？” The most powerful question to stop us from “rescuing” the other person。 An alternative is， “What do you want from me？” The Learning Question: “What was most useful or valuable here for you？” Learning doesn’t happen when you tell them something， it happens when they figure it out for themselves。”“Coaching is the act of staying curious。 Feedback is when you need to share your point of view。”“Generous silence provides space for the other person to be with their own self， for you to be with them， for presence to show up。 It allows them to take a breath。 It whispers， “This is an interesting place to be。 Let’s hang out here for a moment。”― Michael Bungay Stanier， The Advice Trap: Be Humble， Stay Curious & Change the Way You Lead Forever 。。。more
Tomer Mozes-sadeh
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Very practical and concise guide on how to become better at coaching by understanding why we like to advise， when we like to advise and how we disguise our advices while think we’re coaching。Must read for any manager that likes having super powers。
Frank Boucher
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I really liked this book。 Yes， I read The Coaching Habit， that's a nice one too， but in The Advice Trap has something that feels more adapted for when we get started。 The book shares many gems and important points to get us started on a better path （or to change our habits）。 It's may not necessarily be easy， but it's clear what needs to be done， well in this case not done。 I really liked this book。 Yes， I read The Coaching Habit， that's a nice one too， but in The Advice Trap has something that feels more adapted for when we get started。 The book shares many gems and important points to get us started on a better path （or to change our habits）。 It's may not necessarily be easy， but it's clear what needs to be done， well in this case not done。 。。。more
Maxine Hunter
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