Detransition, Baby

Detransition, Baby

  • Downloads:9378
  • Type:Epub+TxT+PDF+Mobi
  • Create Date:2021-12-22 06:51:39
  • Update Date:2025-09-06
  • Status:finish
  • Author:Torrey Peters
  • ISBN:0593133382
  • Environment:PC/Android/iPhone/iPad/Kindle

Summary

NATIONAL BESTSELLER - The lives of three women--transgender and cisgender--collide after an unexpected pregnancy forces them to confront their deepest desires in "one of the most celebrated novels of the year" (Time

"Reading this novel is like holding a live wire in your hand。"--Vulture

LONGLISTED FOR THE PEN/HEMINGWAY AWARD - ONE OF THE TEN BEST BOOKS OF THE YEAR: Entertainment Weekly - ONE OF THE BEST BOOKS OF THE YEAR: The New York Times Book Review, NPR, Time, Vogue, BuzzFeed, New York Public Library, Esquire, Marie Claire, Good Housekeeping, Self, Vulture, Electric Lit, PopSugar, Town & Country, Shelf Awareness, The Rumpus, Autostraddle, Kirkus Reviews, BookPage - Longlisted for The Women's Prize - Roxane Gay's Audacious Book Club Pick - New York Times Editors' Choice

Reese almost had it all: a loving relationship with Amy, an apartment in New York City, a job she didn't hate。 She had scraped together what previous generations of trans women could only dream of: a life of mundane, bourgeois comforts。 The only thing missing was a child。 But then her girlfriend, Amy, detransitioned and became Ames, and everything fell apart。 Now Reese is caught in a self-destructive pattern: avoiding her loneliness by sleeping with married men。

Ames isn't happy either。 He thought detransitioning to live as a man would make life easier, but that decision cost him his relationship with Reese--and losing her meant losing his only family。 Even though their romance is over, he longs to find a way back to her。 When Ames's boss and lover, Katrina, reveals that she's pregnant with his baby--and that she's not sure whether she wants to keep it--Ames wonders if this is the chance he's been waiting for。 Could the three of them form some kind of unconventional family--and raise the baby together?

This provocative debut is about what happens at the emotional, messy, vulnerable corners of womanhood that platitudes and good intentions can't reach。 Torrey Peters brilliantly and fearlessly navigates the most dangerous taboos around gender, sex, and relationships, gifting us a thrillingly original, witty, and deeply moving novel。

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Reviews

Ailish Dougherty

When I read books in general, as much as my empathetic nature allows me to understand the nuances of each character’s perspective, I tend to resort to black and white categorizations in order to process the story - this character is likable, this character is selfish, this character should make this decision, this character is right and that one is wrong, this character is messed up and needs therapy - but this book staunchly protested whenever I tried to make these judgments。Perhaps the piece o When I read books in general, as much as my empathetic nature allows me to understand the nuances of each character’s perspective, I tend to resort to black and white categorizations in order to process the story - this character is likable, this character is selfish, this character should make this decision, this character is right and that one is wrong, this character is messed up and needs therapy - but this book staunchly protested whenever I tried to make these judgments。Perhaps the piece of the story that caused me to perform the most mental gymnastics and perspective-taking was Amy’s struggle with her gender and the way her male identity served as a form of dissociation (the dog metaphor was especially powerful), and I wonder if the author’s choice to essentially cut her out of the second half of the story was a purposeful symbol of the denial of self that was her detransition… Another thing that stood out to me was the hold that gender roles and expectations have on the entire spectrum of sexuality and gender (ex。 the fact that Reese wanted to be treated awfully because it made her feel more feminine- which, honestly, was the most relatable piece of the story to me)。 I also deepened my understanding of how well-intentioned and naïve cis people (like me, like Katrina, who make value judgments based on our own norms) can be harmful to members of the trans community。 Again, this book challenged my instincts to classify desires and needs as either “normal/adaptive” or “abnormal/self-destructive。” I feel honored to have explored the gray areas within its pages! 。。。more

Castille

Wow。 For better or for worse, I can almost guarantee Detransition, Baby will have you feeling all the feels。 The complexities explored in the characters, plot, and society are so nuanced, so well written, so fascinating, and completely immersive。 I love a book that is so solidly inhabiting a point of view that it contradicts itself, like the people it contains-- we are, after all, messy and our theoretical beliefs are often at odds with our actions, our innate feelings, and the practicalities of Wow。 For better or for worse, I can almost guarantee Detransition, Baby will have you feeling all the feels。 The complexities explored in the characters, plot, and society are so nuanced, so well written, so fascinating, and completely immersive。 I love a book that is so solidly inhabiting a point of view that it contradicts itself, like the people it contains-- we are, after all, messy and our theoretical beliefs are often at odds with our actions, our innate feelings, and the practicalities of life。 I don't particularly gravitate towards LGBTQ fiction, so I can't say whether there's much out in the literary universe like this book, but for me, it was a wholly unique experience, seeing the world through this lens。 It flips conventional relationships-- between romantic partners, family, individuals with their bodies and genders, and more-- on their heads。 The philosophical underpinnings and ideologies transcend the narrative in such a way that I felt the need to reexamine my views on motherhood and partnership, and with my body and my views on the bodies of others。 And all of this, within an entertaining, fictional account that somehow manages not to proselytize。 Whether you're staunchly conservative or liberal, straight, gay, poly, ace, male, female, or nonbinary, you can benefit from reading this book。 If you can go into this with an open mind, abandoning your preconceived notions of gender and relationships and the urge to feel combative, it will expand your world view-- which is the very purpose of reading!Also, let's not allow the complicated philosophical element of this book to overshadow the writing itself, which manages to be that rare combination of compelling and literary。 Sure, there are a few moments where Peters seems to fall a bit too in love with her writing, but I fell in love with it, too。 It's been a long time since I've highlighted as much of a book as I did with this。 Do yourself a favor and push through the impulse to judge this book by its subject matter。 Push through any discomfort-- the author is not saying this "alternative lifestyle" is for everyone。 In fact, it's not even for her characters, as they grapple with it, too。 And that's the point。 Find your limits and go past them。 Ask yourself what you believe and why。 What shaped those beliefs? Are they legitimate? As with the ambiguous ending of this book, the questions are far more important than the answers。 。。。more

Sarah Mullié

ja, dit!!!

Tamara Olsen

I loved everything about this book except its actually plot。 Is that even possible? I was completely immersed in every character in this book, the author does an amazing job making you feel and experience everything the characters do。 The writing is so rich and detailed, you can really lose yourself in each scene。 I felt like the book presented key experiences in each character's life so you could see how they ended up where they are in life and why they made the decisions they did without passi I loved everything about this book except its actually plot。 Is that even possible? I was completely immersed in every character in this book, the author does an amazing job making you feel and experience everything the characters do。 The writing is so rich and detailed, you can really lose yourself in each scene。 I felt like the book presented key experiences in each character's life so you could see how they ended up where they are in life and why they made the decisions they did without passing judgment。 It never said this is a good relationship and this is a bad one and this is how you're supposed to do things。 As a cis-hetero woman, I recognize I can never fully understand what it is like to live with gender dysphoria, but this novel gave me perspectives and insights that I truly appreciate。 However, the actually plot of the book moved forward very slowly and honestly felt a bit contrived。 It almost would have worked better as series of vignettes instead of trying to thread it all together in a novel format。Trigger Warning: this book holds nothing back, so be prepared for eating disorders, suicide, AIDS, domestic violence and a wide variety of sex 。。。more

Ivana

DETRANSITION, BABY was a provocative read about three women (one cis, one trans, and one who has detransitioned) and an unplanned pregnancy。 The author, Torrey Peters, a trans white woman, crafts a complex story that deals with taboo topics—especially detransitioning—in a humanizing way。 She also explores a range of issues, from gender and sexuality, to suicide and abuse, to what it means to be a family, while also acknowledging the protagonists’ privileges。 More than once, I found myself realiz DETRANSITION, BABY was a provocative read about three women (one cis, one trans, and one who has detransitioned) and an unplanned pregnancy。 The author, Torrey Peters, a trans white woman, crafts a complex story that deals with taboo topics—especially detransitioning—in a humanizing way。 She also explores a range of issues, from gender and sexuality, to suicide and abuse, to what it means to be a family, while also acknowledging the protagonists’ privileges。 More than once, I found myself realizing aaaalll I take for granted as a cis woman。   I also just came across a review mentioning the comma in the title and damn, I feel like that alone deserves its own analytical essay。   。。。more

Heather

So。 Much。 Talking。 Honestly this book was exhausting to read。 I wanted to like it - the book’s concept really intrigued me。 But it was just… talk-y。 Like it could have used a better editor。 I wanted to give up but plowed through and I can’t say it was worth it。 Meh。

Brittany Malia

Couldn’t get past page 80。 This felt all over the place and plot-less。 Wanted to love based on the reviews but could not follow this book for the life of me。

Becky Spratford

Three Words That Describe This Book: thought provoking, heartwarming, authentic This is a book everyone should read。 It is open and honest about the struggles of trans people in every sense。 Day to day lives and struggles, discrimination, and how to be and start a family。It is also a heartwarming story about "found families" and love in so many ways-- not just romantic or sexual love-- honest human love。Everything is realistically complex but honest。 A character driven story with fictional peopl Three Words That Describe This Book: thought provoking, heartwarming, authentic This is a book everyone should read。 It is open and honest about the struggles of trans people in every sense。 Day to day lives and struggles, discrimination, and how to be and start a family。It is also a heartwarming story about "found families" and love in so many ways-- not just romantic or sexual love-- honest human love。Everything is realistically complex but honest。 A character driven story with fictional people who feel VERY real。It is about humanity, not just the trans experience, and yet, the trans experience is specific。 It features and honors what is different and difficult when one is trans-- how it is not a choice as many cis gendered people feel it is-- but also what unites humans as humans regardless of what their gender identity is。This is a book I have been recommending all year to as many cis people who like relationship fiction as possible。 。。。more

Caitlin Whetten

This book was a lot and it's not going to be for everyone。 But I enjoy stories that deal with messy characters making messy decisions。 I honestly couldn't put this down and really enjoyed Peters' writing and how she's able to get into her characters' heads。 Her prose can sometimes feel like navel-gazing, essay dumps of monologue, but that just really worked for me in this instance。 The characters can be frustrating, but I also felt empathy and understood the unique situation in which they found This book was a lot and it's not going to be for everyone。 But I enjoy stories that deal with messy characters making messy decisions。 I honestly couldn't put this down and really enjoyed Peters' writing and how she's able to get into her characters' heads。 Her prose can sometimes feel like navel-gazing, essay dumps of monologue, but that just really worked for me in this instance。 The characters can be frustrating, but I also felt empathy and understood the unique situation in which they found themselves。 It's very character-driven with very little plot and I enjoy those types of books from time to time。 This book was very frank and brutally honest, full of trigger warnings, and doesn't give any clear answers or detail anything in black and white。 It's a great discussion book and one I'll be thinking about for awhile。 So glad I picked it up。 。。。more

Jill

Very well done! Learned a lot。 :)

Kaija Strautins

Incredibly interesting delve into identity, gender, pregnancy and relationships。 I didn't love all of the decisions characters made, and the ending is open ended, but I will be thinking about this story for a while。 Incredibly interesting delve into identity, gender, pregnancy and relationships。 I didn't love all of the decisions characters made, and the ending is open ended, but I will be thinking about this story for a while。 。。。more

Blue

Have you ever come across a book that you don't personally like but you're glad it exists because it's (hopefully) marking the start of a huge shift in fiction? That was my predominant feeling when I finally finished slogging my way through Detransition, Baby。 To have an extremely queer book about trans women written by a trans woman be published by an imprint of a mainstream publisher and get a fair bit of mainstream coverage gives me hope that we'll see more of this sort of own voice fiction i Have you ever come across a book that you don't personally like but you're glad it exists because it's (hopefully) marking the start of a huge shift in fiction? That was my predominant feeling when I finally finished slogging my way through Detransition, Baby。 To have an extremely queer book about trans women written by a trans woman be published by an imprint of a mainstream publisher and get a fair bit of mainstream coverage gives me hope that we'll see more of this sort of own voice fiction in the future。Don't go into this book hoping for a plot, the premise mentioned in the blurb is really just windowdressing for a discussion about womanhood, particularly womanhood as perceived by a trans woman。 I admit, I prefer my fiction to be plot driven so I probably wouldn't be fond of this book regardless of how well it did this discussion but I do think it could've benefited from a firmer hand when it came to editing。 Peters attempts to do a LOT with this book and it has a negative impact on getting the point across。 There are some thought provoking bits but every time I hoped a particular aspect would be more fleshed out, the book would swiftly move on to an unrelated idea。I also think my opinion of this book wasn't helped by Katrina and Reese never feeling properly fleshed out。 I still don't get why Katrina would humour the idea of this parenting triad - even if it was (view spoiler)[the beginning of her developing her queer identity (hide spoiler)], it's still not a decision one would enter into lightly。 I'm going to refrain from commenting too much on the issues I had with Reese's character (particularly since I'm a cis woman and therefore don't know how much of this was a statement on trans identity that isn't meant for me), but I do wonder what the point was in some of the more problematic thoughts she expressed, such as women liking fascists (ew)。 Was this included purely for the shock factor? Is it meant to be some sort of statement on what society tells women they should like in a man? I didn't get it。 。。。more

Susanna

So part of taking off one star is the editing—the story goes between present and past tense in a way that isn’t intentional。 And I agree with other reviews that it gets awfully talky in spots。 But overall I found this novel to be surprisingly engrossing, compelling, political and persuasive in its appealing/voyeuristic package of the odd trio and their plans to (perhaps) have a baby together。

Caitlin Morris

Brutal! Absolutely brutal。

Janica W

Very interesting read。 Definitely got me considering things I never have before。 While I didn't particularly feel a bond with either main character, I really appreciated the self awareness that at least one of them had。 This book won't be everyone's cup of tea, but would be great for a book club I think。 Very interesting read。 Definitely got me considering things I never have before。 While I didn't particularly feel a bond with either main character, I really appreciated the self awareness that at least one of them had。 This book won't be everyone's cup of tea, but would be great for a book club I think。 。。。more

Jill Boruff

It got slow and long。

Caroline Nieto

Soooo this book was very good。 I heard it recommended by @nina。haines on tiktok all the time, and I decided to just spontaneously pick it up from the library。 It's quite different from anything I've ever read—both in subject matter and in narrative structure。 There were many moments that sort of went off on tangents, but I never felt they were unnecessary。 It brought me closer to the characters to see the natural way their minds would wander。 I felt that the characters were asking the same quest Soooo this book was very good。 I heard it recommended by @nina。haines on tiktok all the time, and I decided to just spontaneously pick it up from the library。 It's quite different from anything I've ever read—both in subject matter and in narrative structure。 There were many moments that sort of went off on tangents, but I never felt they were unnecessary。 It brought me closer to the characters to see the natural way their minds would wander。 I felt that the characters were asking the same questions I was。 Also, although the book uses sort of advanced language and addresses nuanced subjects, I felt I could comprehend it, which was really cool。 And there were definitely a lot of complicated issues brought up, and between the characters, and I found my train of thought following their argument in real time。Overall, both an entertaining and though-provoking experience。 Really good! 。。。more

Elizabeth Higgins

Learned a lot

Courtenay

Honestly made me appreciate the simplicity and privilege of my own fertility & motherhood。

Andrew

Very entertaining, a quick read, kind of like a soap opera, but with very complex, mature, and insightful internal dialogue amongst the characters about gender and sexuality and motherhood。

Franko Figueiredo-Stow

What can I say?! Lucid, engrossing, so much texture… it really asks some very difficult questions。 Loved it!! I am going back to read it again! I’m fact some chapters were so thought provoking that I went back and re read them or stopped to digest what exactly was going on。 Impressive!! #lgbtbookstagram #transbookstagram #booksbooksandmorebooks #bookrecommendations #bookstagrammer #booklover #bookaddict #readingisfundamental

Gary Rothera

Is this Sex and the City fan fiction? Bit of a fluff piece, dare I say cash grab (do people still make money from books?) with a great title, I will say。 During this important period in human and trans history this book seems like a step backward more than forward。 The whole basis was flawed to me, the idea that Reese would bring value to the relationship as a third after all we see of her in the novel is a person who is immature and unlikeable wasn’t believable。 If Reese wanted to be a mother w Is this Sex and the City fan fiction? Bit of a fluff piece, dare I say cash grab (do people still make money from books?) with a great title, I will say。 During this important period in human and trans history this book seems like a step backward more than forward。 The whole basis was flawed to me, the idea that Reese would bring value to the relationship as a third after all we see of her in the novel is a person who is immature and unlikeable wasn’t believable。 If Reese wanted to be a mother why not become one through adoption or surrogacy (perhaps both too expensive?)? Yes it’s unfair to hold Reese to a high expectation as you don’t need to be responsible to get pregnant, but in the scope of Katrina’s relationship to her baby I think we can expect more from Reese if Peters wants us to swallow the big chalky mess of a pill this book is。 The authors biased lens prioritizes queerness and sacrifices female empowerment, or maybe doesn’t even consider it, which is more worrying。 It seemed like we got lost in the weeds and the nuances of their trans journey and beating the drumof queerness so loud it out shadowed everyone。 All in all an enjoyable palette cleanser but again more of Sex and the City fan fiction than anything eye opening。 Felt like a step back in the trans conversation。 Edit:Upon reading other reviews dropping this from 3 stars to 2。 I forgot about the authors weird non-acknowledgment of domestic violence and the almost flippant approach to the funeral scene when there have been 375 trans murders this year。 At first I wanted to say illuminating and educational, but the more I think about this book and the opinions it puts forward I have to think maybe she isn’t teaching the most up to date curriculum。 。。。more

Ileah

There are parts of this book that I found really profound。 It was a very challenging book for me。 It often pushed me to analyze my own judgement of the situation, and my own understanding of what it means to be labeled a slut, pervert, mother, or just femme。 The three main characters of this story are all incredibly imperfect。 While it is refreshing to have such fleshed out and flawed characters, it also made it very hard to read at times。 Reese, especially, is immediately a very difficult chara There are parts of this book that I found really profound。 It was a very challenging book for me。 It often pushed me to analyze my own judgement of the situation, and my own understanding of what it means to be labeled a slut, pervert, mother, or just femme。 The three main characters of this story are all incredibly imperfect。 While it is refreshing to have such fleshed out and flawed characters, it also made it very hard to read at times。 Reese, especially, is immediately a very difficult character to like。 Even worse Reese's character is entirely stagnant。 We are told about events in Reese's life throughout the previous 8 years, but she somehow does not grow or change as a person throughout that whole time。 It made all of the stories of her past come off as next to meaningless when they haven't seemed to affect who she is and what her actions are now。 And it drew much more attention to her flaws, which she doesn't seem to be working on changing。 Reese's character brought up lots of questions about morality, specifically surrounding sex。 She tends to sleep with married men, and there are lots of description of fetish。 The most uncomfortable scenes for me were when abuse was passed off in some way as fetish or as gender affirmation。 I'm not sure if the audience is supposed to feel repulsed by this, but I certainly did。 There also wasn't really a plot to this book。 Almost the entire book occurs in flashbacks, which do a good job of establishing who the characters are, but we don't actually get much from the present day plot。 We were promised the story of 3 people trying to parent in an unconventional way, but that isn't the story that is actually provided here。 。。。more

Jonathan Rhodes

An unapologetic, bold novel that feels groundbreaking for the frankness with which it portrays a multitude of trans experiences。 Peters’ writing is accessible but always feels specific and lived-in without coming across as too earnest。For me, though, the post-conception plot was too frequently halted in favour of backstory and flashbacks - chapters which usually, in and of themselves, felt revealing and important but end up strangely overwhelming the novel。 I can’t say what I’d want editing out, An unapologetic, bold novel that feels groundbreaking for the frankness with which it portrays a multitude of trans experiences。 Peters’ writing is accessible but always feels specific and lived-in without coming across as too earnest。For me, though, the post-conception plot was too frequently halted in favour of backstory and flashbacks - chapters which usually, in and of themselves, felt revealing and important but end up strangely overwhelming the novel。 I can’t say what I’d want editing out, exactly, and I understand that the aim here may have been more a series of character studies, but I was most fascinated by how these three people would relate to each other。 The drip-feed of narrative in that regard, with the central pregnancy story barely developing until three-quarters of the way through, made it a more impatient read than I’d have liked。Still, it’s quite an achievement to scatter so many moments of poignancy, anger, righteousness and radicalism in one book, while still maintaining such a dark sense of humour。 。。。more

Dora

Great book!

Bianca Rogers

It was the ambiguous ending that did it for me! 👏👏👏

Nora

As good as they say it is, def。

Michelle P

A very engaging, funny, easy to read and thought provoking book about three women - two trans and one cisgendered - who try to navigate creating a queer family。 I was oblivious to the experience of de-transitioning before reading this and thought the author did a great job of exploring the complicated feelings and motivations around doing so - one of which being the sheer difficulty of living as a transperson。 At first I was a bit hesitant about the lengthy inner monologues because it felt like A very engaging, funny, easy to read and thought provoking book about three women - two trans and one cisgendered - who try to navigate creating a queer family。 I was oblivious to the experience of de-transitioning before reading this and thought the author did a great job of exploring the complicated feelings and motivations around doing so - one of which being the sheer difficulty of living as a transperson。 At first I was a bit hesitant about the lengthy inner monologues because it felt like the author was over explaining the character's motivations, but these became treasured opportunities for me to relate to Reese and Ames as they imperfectly navigated their lives and their innermost desires。I agree with other critiques that Katrina, who is Chinese-American and cisgendered, was not as developed as Amy and Reese, and in general racial identity was not interrogated with the same depth as gender identity。 This made me interested in reading more novels from transwomen of color, as Torrey Peters is a white transwoman。 Overall, I think this is a truly great book and I would recommend to anyone interested in stories about trans women, motherhood, femininity, self-determination, and maybe even BDSM (!)。 。。。more

Lauren

Intelligent and beautiful。 Wow。

Alice

Wow, that ending! Talk about leaving us hanging in ambiguity (will they or won't they keep the baby?)。 A really well-written and incredibly thoughtful book that examines gender and parenthood and a little bit of how that intersects with race and class。 All of the characters are compelling and complex and three-dimensional。 I felt like I had my eyes opened and my world view broadened by seeing life through the perspectives of Reese, Ames, and Katrina。 Wow, that ending! Talk about leaving us hanging in ambiguity (will they or won't they keep the baby?)。 A really well-written and incredibly thoughtful book that examines gender and parenthood and a little bit of how that intersects with race and class。 All of the characters are compelling and complex and three-dimensional。 I felt like I had my eyes opened and my world view broadened by seeing life through the perspectives of Reese, Ames, and Katrina。 。。。more