The Sweet Spot: The Pleasures of Suffering and the Search for Meaning

The Sweet Spot: The Pleasures of Suffering and the Search for Meaning

  • Downloads:4754
  • Type:Epub+TxT+PDF+Mobi
  • Create Date:2021-10-23 08:51:43
  • Update Date:2025-09-06
  • Status:finish
  • Author:Paul Bloom
  • ISBN:0062910566
  • Environment:PC/Android/iPhone/iPad/Kindle

Summary

From the author of Against Empathy comes a different kind of happiness book, one that shows us how suffering is an essential source of both pleasure and meaning in our lives

Why do we so often seek out physical pain and emotional turmoil? We go to movies that make us cry, or scream, or gag。 We poke at sores, eat spicy foods, immerse ourselves in hot baths, run marathons。 Some of us even seek out pain and humiliation in sexual role-play。 Where do these seemingly perverse appetites come from?

Drawing on groundbreaking findings from psychology and brain science, The Sweet Spot shows how the right kind of suffering sets the stage for enhanced pleasure。 Pain can distract us from our anxieties and help us transcend the self。 Choosing to suffer can serve social goals; it can display how tough we are or, conversely, can function as a cry for help。 Feelings of fear and sadness are part of the pleasure of immersing ourselves in play and fantasy and can provide certain moral satisfactions。 And effort, struggle, and difficulty can, in the right contexts, lead to the joys of mastery and flow。

But suffering plays a deeper role as well。 We are not natural hedonists—a good life involves more than pleasure。 People seek lives of meaning and significance; we aspire to rich relationships and satisfying pursuits, and this requires some amount of struggle, anxiety, and loss。 Brilliantly argued, witty, and humane, Paul Bloom shows how a life without chosen suffering would be empty—and worse than that, boring。   

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Reviews

Marne - Reader By the Water

Not a good fit for me, so I’m abandoning it at 10%。 Impressed that in these few pages, the author quoted both Viktor Frankl and Eminem。

Chris Boutté

It took me far too long to start reading Paul Bloom’s books, but once I started, I couldn’t stop。 After binging his other books like Just Babies, How Pleasure Works, and Against Empathy, I was itching for more from Bloom, and fortunately, I was able to get an advanced copy of this new book。 This book was inspired by Bloom taking a look at the world and seeing our high rates of suffering while also this rise in people trying to find happiness through self-help and pop psychology。 In Paul Bloom fa It took me far too long to start reading Paul Bloom’s books, but once I started, I couldn’t stop。 After binging his other books like Just Babies, How Pleasure Works, and Against Empathy, I was itching for more from Bloom, and fortunately, I was able to get an advanced copy of this new book。 This book was inspired by Bloom taking a look at the world and seeing our high rates of suffering while also this rise in people trying to find happiness through self-help and pop psychology。 In Paul Bloom fashion, he started asking himself a bunch of questions about pleasure and suffering, and this book is a culmination of his research and theories about how we can find the “sweet spot” between pain and pleasure。 This book is insanely good and like nothing I’ve read before (and this is coming from someone who reads hundreds of non-fiction books a year)。 Is there such thing as too much pleasure? Why do we find more satisfaction after suffering? Is there something about people who self-harm that we’re not seeing? Bloom tries to answer all of these questions and so much more, and the book really makes the reader reflect on how we pursue pleasure。 Sometimes, there are books that are so good and thought provoking that even though I want to binge them, I have to take some time after each chapter to really let it all sink in, and that’s what this book does。 The Sweet Spot has such a great blend of psychology, philosophy, and scientific research, and I really think it’ll help a lot of people have a shift in perspective when it comes to how we perceive many important topics when it comes to our personal well-being。 。。。more

J Earl

The Sweet Spot from Paul Bloom is an enlightening read that draws as many points from the reader's own mind as from any theory。 I'll explain momentarily, but what Bloom excels at is explaining his ideas through analogy and anecdotes such that we gain quite a bit of knowledge without realizing it。I'll start by admitting I like Bloom's work。 I am not always in complete agreement but I can count on him to make me think about and reconsider many of my own ideas。 In addition to several of his books I The Sweet Spot from Paul Bloom is an enlightening read that draws as many points from the reader's own mind as from any theory。 I'll explain momentarily, but what Bloom excels at is explaining his ideas through analogy and anecdotes such that we gain quite a bit of knowledge without realizing it。I'll start by admitting I like Bloom's work。 I am not always in complete agreement but I can count on him to make me think about and reconsider many of my own ideas。 In addition to several of his books I also took a couple of his online MOOCs, and his books are a lot like listening to his lectures。 Before you think that is a negative, let me explain。 His lectures are almost conversational in tone, so the book is also almost conversational in tone。As humans we have an amazing ability to state unequivocally that we believe two things that are not only incompatible but contradictory。 An area where we do this quite a bit is when we discuss the purpose of life or, another way, how we live our lives。 Are we pleasure seeking animals, plain and simple? Are we selfish and only think of our own best interests? And so on。 Bloom doesn't so much counter all of the ways we think about this as make us think about all of them with more nuance and less certitude。 Like so many things, how we define a term makes a big difference。 Pain or suffering defined using a broad spectrum allows for more variation in how we will answer the question about whether suffering (sometimes and certain types) is good and even desirable。This book entertains while it educates, and many of Bloom's points seem to be drawn from our own experiences。 His examples of ways of thinking or acting will resonate with us and from these he illustrates the value, and necessity, of suffering。 In particular when it serves to give our lives some meaning。My convoluted commentary does not do the book justice, but hopefully it shows how Bloom engages his readers to consider old ideas with a bit more nuance。 Reviewed from a copy made available by the publisher via NetGalley。 。。。more