Parenting

What No One Tells You: A Guide to Your Emotions from Pregnancy to Motherhood

What No One Tells You: A Guide to Your Emotions from Pregnancy to Motherhood

  • Downloads：6498
  • Type：Epub+TxT+PDF+Mobi
  • Create Date：2021-07-30 06:53:33
  • Update Date：2025-09-06
  • Status：finish
  • Author：Alexandra Sacks
  • ISBN：1501112562
  • Environment：PC/Android/iPhone/iPad/Kindle
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Summary

Your guide to the emotions of pregnancy and early motherhood， from two of America’s top reproductive psychiatrists。

When you are pregnant， you get plenty of advice about your growing body and developing baby。 Yet so much about motherhood happens in your head。 What everyone really wants to know: Is this normal？

-Even after months of trying， is it normal to panic after finding out you’re pregnant？
-Is it normal not to feel love at first sight for your baby？
-Is it normal to fight with your parents and partner？
-Is it normal to feel like a breastfeeding failure？
-Is it normal to be zonked by “mommy brain？”

In What No One Tells You， two of America’s top reproductive psychiatrists reassure you that the answer is yes。 With thirty years of combined experience counseling new and expectant mothers， they provide a psychological and hormonal backstory to the complicated emotions that women experience， and show why it’s natural for “matrescence”—the birth of a mother—to be as stressful and transformative a period as adolescence。

Here， finally， is the first-ever practical guide to help new mothers feel less guilt and more self-esteem， less isolation and more kinship， less resentment and more intimacy， less exhaustion and more pleasure， and learn other tips to navigate the ups and downs of this exciting， demanding time

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Reviews

Katie ，

I found this really helpful， especially at the start of pregnancy。 I may go back and re-read the parts about after birth。 It's the kind of book you want to read the applicable parts of， rather than reading cover to cover。 I found this really helpful， especially at the start of pregnancy。 I may go back and re-read the parts about after birth。 It's the kind of book you want to read the applicable parts of， rather than reading cover to cover。 。。。more

Megan （Sheffield） ，

Helpful tips for those expecting

E S ，

I am super thankful for this book: it helped me navigate pregnancy and postpartum in a way that not many other books on the same topics did。 It helps you think through the mental and emotional aspects of becoming a mother， with insights from psychiatrists and practical tips for navigating this new phase。 It’s encouraging and helpful， too。

Jessica ，

This has been really helpful so far in pregnancy both for anticipating and preparing for potential issues， dealing in the moment， and for just validation of all the crazy emotions on this rollercoaster。 It's good to know so many of the things I've felt are typical and normal even if they're hard。 This has been really helpful so far in pregnancy both for anticipating and preparing for potential issues， dealing in the moment， and for just validation of all the crazy emotions on this rollercoaster。 It's good to know so many of the things I've felt are typical and normal even if they're hard。 。。。more

Kuleigh ，

This is a great resource for pregnancy and postpartum geared towards first time parents。 You can easily read it in a weekend。 The language is easy to read and sympathetic。 The authors cover a plethora of information in very short chapters but there is a resources section at the end of the book for topics that might require more detail。 As a second time mom， I found the chapters on birth and postpartum emotions most helpful。 The book had a lot of good reminders that just because something is comm This is a great resource for pregnancy and postpartum geared towards first time parents。 You can easily read it in a weekend。 The language is easy to read and sympathetic。 The authors cover a plethora of information in very short chapters but there is a resources section at the end of the book for topics that might require more detail。 As a second time mom， I found the chapters on birth and postpartum emotions most helpful。 The book had a lot of good reminders that just because something is common， it doesn't mean it is normal and offered suggestions for how to seek out appropriate help whether it be from your OBGYN， family and friends， or other professional。 Overally， another good self-help/parenting book to keep around and skim when you need to go back and reference something！ 。。。more

Aileen M ，

This book can pretty simply be summarized: all emotions are valid and you are not a bad parent or going to be a bad parent because of the specific emotions you are feeling。 My past feelings were validated and I am glad to know what to expect emotionally in the months to come。 I also appreciate the resources provided on the back of the book， which will be a good reference as needed。

Lauren Hillman ，

Actually somewhat helpful and interesting。It didn’t feel like a lot of unknown information I was learning as I listened to this book。 It was just nice to hear a lot of reiteration that there’s a wide variety of normal for women。 Lots of women love this part of pregnancy。。。 lots of women hate it。 Here’s something that often happens， here’s a few options for how to deal with it。。。 it’s all normal。It was just nice reassurance。 I will say how glad I am to be pregnant during a pandemic。 I doubt I’ll Actually somewhat helpful and interesting。It didn’t feel like a lot of unknown information I was learning as I listened to this book。 It was just nice to hear a lot of reiteration that there’s a wide variety of normal for women。 Lots of women love this part of pregnancy。。。 lots of women hate it。 Here’s something that often happens， here’s a few options for how to deal with it。。。 it’s all normal。It was just nice reassurance。 I will say how glad I am to be pregnant during a pandemic。 I doubt I’ll have the issue of random strangers touching my belly without permission。 Apparently that’s super common and wtf is wrong with people？？ 。。。more

Rachael ，

I just kind of skimmed this book for the most part because I got it during my ninth month of pregnancy。 It’s mostly things people who don’t read or don’t have a support system should be aware could happen in your mind。 I was disappointed that it’s mostly full of scenarios without options for resolution。 For example， the section on how to tell friends includes the scenario that someone might be hurt or jealous because you are pregnant and they are not， and the advice is to be considerate of their I just kind of skimmed this book for the most part because I got it during my ninth month of pregnancy。 It’s mostly things people who don’t read or don’t have a support system should be aware could happen in your mind。 I was disappointed that it’s mostly full of scenarios without options for resolution。 For example， the section on how to tell friends includes the scenario that someone might be hurt or jealous because you are pregnant and they are not， and the advice is to be considerate of their feelings。 While it’s good advice， that’s literally it。 There are no examples of how to do that or things to say or do to make them feel more comfortable about you wanting to share your news or how to make you more comfortable with not sharing the news out of respect。 I’m in that situation even now and still think I’m handling it horribly， and this book did not add anything to my arsenal。 It’s just a bit over generalized for my taste。 I’d rather it have been longer with more depth。 Mostly， it’s nice to know that I’m not the only pregnant person who worries about a lot of these things， but I had hoped to glean more insight about these worries than was presented。 I don’t have many people to talk to about these things， and the ones I do have are either ambivalent or more negative than they realize while also telling me it’s normal to feel the way I’m feeling。 Or， they haven’t been pregnant or can’t be （like my husband）， and while their support is nice， it’s an impression of what I’m experiencing emotionally， not rooted in their own experience。 I have spent this entire pregnancy not being able to relate to anyone because of pandemic restrictions and it blows。 I was hoping this book would help， but it wasn’t really what I wanted。 。。。more

Liv Remez ，

A must if for those who were/are/plan to be pregnant。

Bridget Johnson （Jameson） ，

I skipped around a little reading the sections that I think best apply to me， but I’ll also keep this on my kindle in case I want to refer to it in the future。 This book provides kind of an overview of pregnancy， childbirth， and early parenting through the lens of feelings that a （female， child-bearing） mother might experience， and how one might work through these feelings。 It’s somewhat evidence based and pretty middle of the road regarding parenting styles。 （Ie it doesn’t say co-sleeping is ba I skipped around a little reading the sections that I think best apply to me， but I’ll also keep this on my kindle in case I want to refer to it in the future。 This book provides kind of an overview of pregnancy， childbirth， and early parenting through the lens of feelings that a （female， child-bearing） mother might experience， and how one might work through these feelings。 It’s somewhat evidence based and pretty middle of the road regarding parenting styles。 （Ie it doesn’t say co-sleeping is bad， but does mention the AAP guidelines for safe sleep。）This book isn’t not a replacement for an in-depth look at pregnancy， birth， or any aspect of parenting， but seems like a good complement to book like the Mayo Clinic Guide to a Healthy Pregnancy， which goes much deeper and is much more scientific but which I’m pretty sure doesn’t mention the words “self care。” 。。。more

Molly ，

An interesting exploration of the complicated and often conflicting emotions that a woman experiences throughout pregnancy and childbirth。 I feel more prepared emotionally and psychologically because of this book！

Rachel Glass ，

This will be useful to pick up at various points and has some helpful exercises。 I also really appreciated how the authors acknowledge those becoming parents without a partner （not my situation but if it were I can imagine being really put off by the assumption by many 'baby book' authors that everyone has a supportive partner）。 My only thought was that some of the suggestions of journaling etc might not be particularly practical with a newborn。 This will be useful to pick up at various points and has some helpful exercises。 I also really appreciated how the authors acknowledge those becoming parents without a partner （not my situation but if it were I can imagine being really put off by the assumption by many 'baby book' authors that everyone has a supportive partner）。 My only thought was that some of the suggestions of journaling etc might not be particularly practical with a newborn。 。。。more

Sarah Brin ，

I read this as part of my postpartum doula certification process。 Love this book！ An easily readable book about mental health during and after pregnancy。

CW ，

This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers。 To view it， click here。 Good overview of emotion swing before and after pregnancy

Ruth ，

I would rate this a 5， except for the truly unfortunate packaging it comes in （i didn't pick this up for over a year because of the goofy font and cover design） and because it's more of an outline than a guide。 BUT don't let that stop you from reading this， these authors/psychiatrists have put together healthy psychological support for the transitions and emotional challenges in pregnancy， delivery， and maternal/infant care postpartum！ I highly recommend！！ I would rate this a 5， except for the truly unfortunate packaging it comes in （i didn't pick this up for over a year because of the goofy font and cover design） and because it's more of an outline than a guide。 BUT don't let that stop you from reading this， these authors/psychiatrists have put together healthy psychological support for the transitions and emotional challenges in pregnancy， delivery， and maternal/infant care postpartum！ I highly recommend！！ 。。。more

Allison Sikes ，

This really focuses on the birth of a mother in addition to the birth of a child。 It is also very inclusive of different types of families as well as gender and sexual identities which I appreciated。 It doesn’t go extremely in depth in any one area but provides abundant resources for further exploration。

Allison ，

A nice overview with lots of different perspectives to consider which has been helpful as a therapist working with lots of different parents。 None of the topics go too in depth but it’s a great starting point for finding areas where you might require more reflection/introspection。

Wakakanunu ，

Finally a non-judgemental book for new moms who are going through the tremendous changes in body and mind。

Kara Bailey ，

This would be a great read for first time moms。 Some of it was very redundant for me， but some goo reminders and practical/useful advice。

Iva ，

Ako zanemarim dio o sleep trainingu， vrlo informativna i pitka。

Jenna ，

I read this book after reading an article by Alexandra Sacks。 I started it at almost 4 months postpartum， but I wish I had known about it when I was pregnant。 I actually started in the middle of it， then went back and read all the parts about pregnancy and delivery， because I found the book was so good at normalizing the emotions and experiences I had。 This book helped me feel so much better about myself as I shift into motherhood。 I recommend it to all my pregnant friends。

Elise Shuman ，

I found the sections about L&D and post-partum/the first year more helpful than the pregnancy sections。

Carly Dart ，

Every woman in life NEEDS to purchase and read this book。 Daughter， mother， grandmother！ It’s well worth a read for everyone， I think there’s a lot to take out of it from every aspect

Lexie Frensley ，

Just wish there was a chapter on how to be pregnant during a pandemic。

Valerie ，

When I found out I was pregnant， I immediately googled all the best books out there。 This one is unique in that it focuses primarily on the mom's mental health。 I wish it had an appendix for "what to do while pregnant during a global pandemic，" but a lot of the advice is applicable， and there's good information for specific problems like situations that arise with partners， family， and friends during this time。 There's a lot of "This is a normal feeling" commentary that bears repeating。 Recommen When I found out I was pregnant， I immediately googled all the best books out there。 This one is unique in that it focuses primarily on the mom's mental health。 I wish it had an appendix for "what to do while pregnant during a global pandemic，" but a lot of the advice is applicable， and there's good information for specific problems like situations that arise with partners， family， and friends during this time。 There's a lot of "This is a normal feeling" commentary that bears repeating。 Recommended if you are looking for some anxiety-calming narratives during pregnancy。 。。。more

Becca Niner ，

Extremely thorough， and more inclusive of intersectional concerns than most pregnancy books I have read。

Lisa Hough-Stewart ，

This was recommended by a friend and I found it very accessible， helpful and validating。 Wish I'd read it earlier in pregnancy！Only downside is some aspects are very specific to the US and not that relevant for those of us living elsewhere i。e。 about healthcare systems and work rules/cultures。 Worth bearing in mind if you're not American， but it's still a very worthwhile read。 This was recommended by a friend and I found it very accessible， helpful and validating。 Wish I'd read it earlier in pregnancy！Only downside is some aspects are very specific to the US and not that relevant for those of us living elsewhere i。e。 about healthcare systems and work rules/cultures。 Worth bearing in mind if you're not American， but it's still a very worthwhile read。 。。。more

Zoe Nieuwenhuizen ，

Really helpful book， I would recommend it to anyone having a child。 This book covered the emotional journey of having a child in a relatable manner and was easy to read。 My only criticism was that I wish it went into more depth on certain topics。

Cory ，

Especially useful if you don't have access to a therapist， or one with perinatal expertise。 Easy to skim。 I found the birth and postpartum parts more interesting - and more neglected in the literature！ Especially useful if you don't have access to a therapist， or one with perinatal expertise。 Easy to skim。 I found the birth and postpartum parts more interesting - and more neglected in the literature！ 。。。more

Callie Hass ，

I think this book would be SUPER helpful if you'd never done any therapy or self-exploration before or during pregnancy。 Most of the concepts and tools outlined in the book are things I already knew。 It has a few interesting examples and a very down-to-earth and non-judgemental approach that I do find comforting。 The concept of the good-enough mother is discussed and I personally am planning to use that as my touchstone when compare and despair get out of control。 I think this book would be SUPER helpful if you'd never done any therapy or self-exploration before or during pregnancy。 Most of the concepts and tools outlined in the book are things I already knew。 It has a few interesting examples and a very down-to-earth and non-judgemental approach that I do find comforting。 The concept of the good-enough mother is discussed and I personally am planning to use that as my touchstone when compare and despair get out of control。 。。。more

Reference

google book https://www.google.com/search?tbm=bks&q=What No One Tells You: A Guide to Your Emotions from Pregnancy to Motherhood

hathitrust digital library https://babel.hathitrust.org/cgi/ls?q1=What No One Tells You: A Guide to Your Emotions from Pregnancy to Motherhood&field1=ocr&a=srchls&ft=ft&lmt=ft

The British Library https://bll01.primo.exlibrisgroup.com/discovery/search?query=any,contains,What No One Tells You: A Guide to Your Emotions from Pregnancy to Motherhood&tab=LibraryCatalog&search_scope=Not_BL_Suppress&vid=44BL_INST:BLL01&lang=en&offset=0