A Bit of a Stretch: The Diaries of a Prisoner
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- Create Date：2021-06-10 00:53:14
- Update Date：2025-09-06
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- Author：Chris Atkins
- ISBN：1838950176
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Summary
A shocking and darkly funny account of the reality of Britain's prisons。
Where can a tin of tuna buy you clean clothes？ Which British education system struggles with 50% illiteracy？ Where do teetotal Muslims attend AA meetings？ Where is it easier to get 'spice' than paracetamol？ Where does self-harm barely raise an eyebrow？
Welcome to Her Majesty's Prison Service， a creaking and surreal world that has been left to rot for decades in the shadows of polite society。 Like most people， documentary-maker Chris Atkins didn't spend much time thinking about prisons。 But after becoming embroiled in a dodgy scheme to fund his latest film， he was sent down for five years。 His new home would be HMP Wandsworth， one of the oldest， largest， and most dysfunctional prisons in Europe。
Horrifying， moving， and darkly funny， this is the unvarnished depiction of what he found。 With a cast of characters ranging from wily drug dealers to corrupt screws to senior officials bent on endless （and fruitless） reform， this is the reality behind the locked gates。 Full of incredible and hilarious stories， A Bit of a Stretch reveals the true scale of our prison crisis and why it is costing us all。
Where can a tin of tuna buy you clean clothes？ Which British education system struggles with 50% illiteracy？ Where do teetotal Muslims attend AA meetings？ Where is it easier to get 'spice' than paracetamol？ Where does self-harm barely raise an eyebrow？
Welcome to Her Majesty's Prison Service， a creaking and surreal world that has been left to rot for decades in the shadows of polite society。 Like most people， documentary-maker Chris Atkins didn't spend much time thinking about prisons。 But after becoming embroiled in a dodgy scheme to fund his latest film， he was sent down for five years。 His new home would be HMP Wandsworth， one of the oldest， largest， and most dysfunctional prisons in Europe。
Horrifying， moving， and darkly funny， this is the unvarnished depiction of what he found。 With a cast of characters ranging from wily drug dealers to corrupt screws to senior officials bent on endless （and fruitless） reform， this is the reality behind the locked gates。 Full of incredible and hilarious stories， A Bit of a Stretch reveals the true scale of our prison crisis and why it is costing us all。
Reviews
Phoebe
，
This was a really interesting insight into the prison system。 Only giving it 4 stars because it was a little strung out in parts and im not sure how rereadable it is。
Isabelle Bowles
，
This book highlighted the problems in the prison system and how many factors affect sentencing and life in prison。It was a very eye opening book as it come from someone who experienced it first hand in a time period not too long ago。 Would highly recommend this book to everyone。
Katie
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A very entertaining， and at times difficult， read。 Atkins portrays Britain’s prison crisis in a way that is both intensely personal and strangely humorous。 As he himself indicates， often the only people who have knowledge of how to achieve prison reform are locked up， and because of that I applaud his initiative — his suggestions for reform are tangible and have the potential to make a big impact， like improving mental health services and healthcare， hiring more officers， and creating more oppor A very entertaining， and at times difficult， read。 Atkins portrays Britain’s prison crisis in a way that is both intensely personal and strangely humorous。 As he himself indicates， often the only people who have knowledge of how to achieve prison reform are locked up， and because of that I applaud his initiative — his suggestions for reform are tangible and have the potential to make a big impact， like improving mental health services and healthcare， hiring more officers， and creating more opportunities for education （I was actually very surprised at all the opportunities for paid work within the prisons）。 The chapters about Atkins’ experiences as a Listener were hard to get through， containing difficult descriptions of suicide and self-harm that didn’t really fit with the book’s lighthearted tone。 The main issue I had with the novel was that I think it falls victim to something that happens a lot with memoirs: the people and events start to feel like characters and plot points。 Atkins presented everything with a humor that was likely a coping mechanism for a difficult time， but it often made his real life experiences feel exaggerated， when in all likelihood they were not。 The narration also suffered in that it often made prison sound at times almost enjoyable and somewhat trivial， like a video game in which Atkins was constantly trying to beat each level （he does address in the epilogue that his perspective is extremely privileged， but this point doesn’t really land while you read the novel）。 I think this as a whole is especially dangerous for a book that seeks to provide commentary on a topic as controversial and important as the conditions of incarceration and prison reform。“Prison is what lies behind the mirror of consumer capitalism， the unseen consequence of telling everyone they can have whatever they want。” 。。。more
Penny
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Good read！ Quite a few laughs throughout and an eye opening look at the prison system。 It does get a bit same-y near the end but definitely worth a read！
Jane Rex
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My review is that everyone needs to read this book！I read this straight after reading "This is Going to Hurt: The Secret Diaries of a Junior Doctor" By Adam Kay。 It had a VERY similar vibe: It managed to be really bloody funny， and immensely deep all in one。There is inherent structural racism and classism in British Prisons。Chris， being an affluent， educated at Oxford， middle class white man， quickly rises to the top of the prison hierarchy and enjoys many privileges （which he is quick to acknow My review is that everyone needs to read this book！I read this straight after reading "This is Going to Hurt: The Secret Diaries of a Junior Doctor" By Adam Kay。 It had a VERY similar vibe: It managed to be really bloody funny， and immensely deep all in one。There is inherent structural racism and classism in British Prisons。Chris， being an affluent， educated at Oxford， middle class white man， quickly rises to the top of the prison hierarchy and enjoys many privileges （which he is quick to acknowledge）。 In his role as a "Listener"， he witnesses first hand， the horrors that the other prisoners face。 Most of whom are totally illiterate and suffer from severe mental health problems， which they get no medical support for。 Many of them self-harm。 For them， prison drastically reduces their life chances and they leave in a much worse off state than they started。 Many go on to commit even worse crimes。 Through his diaries， we experience the extraordinary day-to-day life with Chris， through hilarious and sometimes extremely sad anecdotes。 We witness the mind-numbing beaurocracy and the many dumb mistakes the system makes which drastically reduce the quality of prisoners lives。Chris Atkins goes on to highlight many of the systematic failings of the British prison system and then outlines methods of improvement， focusing on rehabilitating the prisoners。 It's quite telling that the book about prisons that makes it to the bestseller list， is one written by an affluent white man。 But， to be fair， Chris does a very good job of giving a balanced account of his time whilst acknowledging his privilege。 Definitely a worthwhile read。 。。。more
Al Menaster
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Quite good。 Years in a British prison， written by a white collar inmate with terrific writing skills。 He gives a tremendous feel for what life is like in prison: random， arbitrary， horrific， even when there is no violence directed to an inmate。
Aswin
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This book manages to be funny， informative and disturbing （at times）， sometimes over a couple of pages。 British prison system needs to be looked at properly， I was genuinely shocked reading about the inhumane conditions in prisons and issues that affects the prisoners。 Enjoyed Chris Atkins' writing style， I'll definitely keep an eye out for anything else he writes。 This book manages to be funny， informative and disturbing （at times）， sometimes over a couple of pages。 British prison system needs to be looked at properly， I was genuinely shocked reading about the inhumane conditions in prisons and issues that affects the prisoners。 Enjoyed Chris Atkins' writing style， I'll definitely keep an eye out for anything else he writes。 。。。more
Chloe Hampton
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Easy listening and fascinating to hear a first hand account what it’s like inside Wandsworth。 Walked past the prison once whilst listening and it was odd to put a sight to a story。
Helen
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I’m pleased I’ve read this book and if you like fact based stories then you’ll enjoy this。 It has darkness， but some humour。 It’s left me with a changed view on prisoners and prison reform ， which is a good thing。 It took me a while to get into it， but glad I stuck with it。
Melissa Kane
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Interesting， eye-opening， amusing and depressing by turn。 The state of UK prisons is honestly not something I've ever given a great deal of thought to， apart from to shudder at the thought of being locked up in one。 However， the reality is a disgrace， as this middle-class， white collar criminal discovered and has written so eloquently about。 Even if the inmates deserve to be there， I don't think many would argue that the conditions he describes are safe， humane or in any way effective。 Most of t Interesting， eye-opening， amusing and depressing by turn。 The state of UK prisons is honestly not something I've ever given a great deal of thought to， apart from to shudder at the thought of being locked up in one。 However， the reality is a disgrace， as this middle-class， white collar criminal discovered and has written so eloquently about。 Even if the inmates deserve to be there， I don't think many would argue that the conditions he describes are safe， humane or in any way effective。 Most of the people incarcerated will one day be out again walking our streets， so it's in everyone's interest that prisons work and that they rehabilitate inmates with effective programs。 I hope this book is widely read and that the suggestions the author makes in the Epilogue are taken seriously， because behind the laughable awfulness is a very serious situation indeed。 Bravo Chris for making lemonade with the batch of lemons he was given。 。。。more
Shirley
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Bit of a wide boy but an engaging insight into prison life
Nanda
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Interessant en eerlijk geschreven boek over de ervaringen van een man in een Engelse gevangenis。 Sommige onderwerpen zijn verbazend om te lezen （de slechte healthcare bijvoorbeeld en de administratieve rompslomp die daar kennelijk heerst） Ben nu wel benieuwd of het in Nederlandse gevangenissen beter is？
R H
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This book has really made me rethink my attitude to prisons， prisoners and the role of incarceration in society。 As Atkins notes， the British approach has long been the importance of punishment and deprivation。 However， how does that actually help？ Is someone who has suffered through years in Wandsworth prison going to be filled with any kind of goodwill towards society in general， and especially the government who put them there？ A really fascinating look into the prison experience and the smal This book has really made me rethink my attitude to prisons， prisoners and the role of incarceration in society。 As Atkins notes， the British approach has long been the importance of punishment and deprivation。 However， how does that actually help？ Is someone who has suffered through years in Wandsworth prison going to be filled with any kind of goodwill towards society in general， and especially the government who put them there？ A really fascinating look into the prison experience and the small positives that exist - the Listening programme was really interesting to learn about （and provided some humanity in the abyss） and by the middle I was almost laughing at the ridiculousness of the prison rules and officers。 。。。more
Amanda
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Certainly thought provoking。
Jillian Bowyer
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Definitely worth a read。 A powerful book 。
Michael Hyatt
，
Outstanding， thoughtful， insightful and provocative。
Gemma
，
Wow。 This is a shocking account of life in wandsworth prison。 I hadn't given much thought to what life behind bars looked like， but was guilty like many people of believing prisoners had an easy life 。 This really opened my eyes to the reality of what happens inside prisons。I was shocked， stunned，appaled and saddened to hear the truth。 Backed up with facts， studies and plenty of statistics。 This makes for a gripping， interesting read ， put together with Chris's dry humour making it Incredibly en Wow。 This is a shocking account of life in wandsworth prison。 I hadn't given much thought to what life behind bars looked like， but was guilty like many people of believing prisoners had an easy life 。 This really opened my eyes to the reality of what happens inside prisons。I was shocked， stunned，appaled and saddened to hear the truth。 Backed up with facts， studies and plenty of statistics。 This makes for a gripping， interesting read ， put together with Chris's dry humour making it Incredibly entertaining too。 。。。more
Frederik Jukema
，
I read this book to understand better what is going on within a prisoner’s mind。 I have read papers that stated that ‘prisons to punish’ only make criminals worse， rather than ‘prison to learn’ to make criminals more qualified to understand what they did wrong and how they can do better in society。 This book confirms this call for a prison reform。If you are curious to how a prisoner experienced the most extreme things in prison and how it crushes you mentally。 This is the book to read！
Gemma Mills
，
Eye-opening， funny and shocking。 I have found that my thoughts have kept coming back to this book over the week I was reading this book and I have not stopped talking about it either。
Cathy Lee
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Chris states throughout the book that the media and government paint inaccurate pictures of how prison life is - having read this book， I completely agree。 I still believe that if people commit crimes， they deserve to be punished; however， I still see criminals as people and deserving of basic human rights。 Some of the stories described in this book are truly shocking and I can’t believe the level of crisis in our prisons。 The loop holes people must jump through for basic needs is ridiculous， an Chris states throughout the book that the media and government paint inaccurate pictures of how prison life is - having read this book， I completely agree。 I still believe that if people commit crimes， they deserve to be punished; however， I still see criminals as people and deserving of basic human rights。 Some of the stories described in this book are truly shocking and I can’t believe the level of crisis in our prisons。 The loop holes people must jump through for basic needs is ridiculous， and the lack of care regarding mental illness reminds me of the Middle Ages。 Overall， a really interesting read and I would recommend to anyone who believes the media comments that prison is like a holiday camp！ 。。。more
Sonja Arlow
，
3。5 stars“The degree of civilization in a society can be judged by entering its prisons。” DostoevskyWritten with insight， （much needed） humour and a healthy dose of reality check。 Chris Atkins， a professional film maker ends up behind bars for a crime he committed。 Yep unlike most convicts he is honest about his mistakes as well as the lessons learned in the 2 1/2 years he served his sentence。Don’t expect just salacious， violent， disturbing stories of life behind bars。 This feels like a much mo 3。5 stars“The degree of civilization in a society can be judged by entering its prisons。” DostoevskyWritten with insight， （much needed） humour and a healthy dose of reality check。 Chris Atkins， a professional film maker ends up behind bars for a crime he committed。 Yep unlike most convicts he is honest about his mistakes as well as the lessons learned in the 2 1/2 years he served his sentence。Don’t expect just salacious， violent， disturbing stories of life behind bars。 This feels like a much more grounded-in-reality story。 There are sections that left me sad and frustrated on behalf of the prisoners （shock gasp） because let’s face it not every person behind bars is the personification of Satan。In a broken system where the rules do not make sense you have to find a way through the cracks。So， if you ever find yourself in a UK prison， there are a few tips to make life bearable。 One of which is to sign up for everything， and I mean everything。 That’s why， in Wandsworth， the majority of attendees for AA meetings were teetotal Muslims。 I found the concept of the Listeners fascinating。 This is a buddy-system where selected （and mostly very poorly trained） prisoners will be on call to listen and talk to others that are either self-harming， at breaking point or completely off their heads （and meds）。 As with all prisons there are two main things that hold back real progress:1） Those in authority only doing what will get them ahead by playing the political game2） The public’s skewed perception of what really goes on in prisons and the general attitude of “out of sight out of mind”Because I am not a UK citizen there were sections that I found completely irrelevant and others where local references were lost on me， but the general gist of a broken system that never results in true reform is universal。 I have found it increasingly difficult in the past few months to get books that can hold my attention but this one did a stellar job， so I have rounded up my rating because of it。 。。。more
Z
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Fascinating insight into prison life。Couldn’t put it down。
Natalie Bagshaw
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This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers。 To view it， click here。 This book infuriated me！！！Chris Atkins gets sentenced in Wandsworth prison。。。 he quickly， and I mean within a matter of weeks， manages to get himself shifted into a better wing， a better cell and in a matter of months， an open prison。 This book is him moaning about the prison system from the word go！ Being in one prison for 9 months does not make you an expert who should be complaining about the whole system！ He complains about not being able to see his son and not call home - it is prison！！！ It This book infuriated me！！！Chris Atkins gets sentenced in Wandsworth prison。。。 he quickly， and I mean within a matter of weeks， manages to get himself shifted into a better wing， a better cell and in a matter of months， an open prison。 This book is him moaning about the prison system from the word go！ Being in one prison for 9 months does not make you an expert who should be complaining about the whole system！ He complains about not being able to see his son and not call home - it is prison！！！ It is meant to he punishment， not a break。 He speaks in one part about prisoners being able to earn things like play stations。 People not in prison don't own play stations， I don't see why prisoners should get them？What I will say is that the service Chris does whist in prison is really commendable - he becomes a 'listener' for those people having suicidal thoughts。 Hats off to him for this， that cannot have been easy and I do think that the lack of mental health support and medical attention prisoners get in this book is disgusting。 Within the epilogue， he speaks of the night one of the inmates commits suicide and to think that staff sat drinking a cup of tea whilst a poor kid killed himself is disgusting。 I hope that the people involved in that were punished accordingly。 However， I still think that the rants in this book are by someone who just didn't think they should be in prison。 Clearly from the moment he stepped foot in there， he felt it was unjust him being in prison for the crime he committed。 He knew what he was doing was illegal and he could have said no， but he didn't。 Atkins discusses the fact that the UK has the worst reoffending rate in the world。 Most prisoners will go back to prison。 Whilst he sees that as our prison system failing inmates， I do wonder if it is actually because the outside world is sometimes harder。 Has he visited prisons across the world？ Has he looked at the rehabilitation available there？ Has he seen the conditions of those prisons？ If so he never discusses that in this book and it made me wonder of rather than our prisons being too hard， they were actually bot hard enough？ I've never visited a prison and therefore not qualified to say so。 However， I also don't think one prison visit makes you an expert either。 。。。more
Hannah Miles
，
An interesting easy read。 The author does a great job of humanising prisons， but I felt like a lot of chapters we're a bit superficial。 The epilogue with recommendations is interesting， but potentially a bit simplistic and I would have liked to have seen a more in-depth take on things。 An interesting easy read。 The author does a great job of humanising prisons， but I felt like a lot of chapters we're a bit superficial。 The epilogue with recommendations is interesting， but potentially a bit simplistic and I would have liked to have seen a more in-depth take on things。 。。。more
Flora
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An important read， which， like many other memoirs I've read recently， serves as a damning indictment of the Tory party and their austerity measures。 An important read， which， like many other memoirs I've read recently， serves as a damning indictment of the Tory party and their austerity measures。 。。。more
Jonathan Rainbolt
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I was expecting this be dull and slow read， but it turned out be a quite fast and enjoyable one; I think it was mostly due to the way it was written。
Louise Gooding
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Definitely listen to the audio version of this book！
MANJ
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Harrowing insights into life behind one of UK’s most notorious prisons。 It doesn’t shy away from some of the horrific crimes that prisoners have been incarcerated for but does present the human side。
Liz Rolph
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A really interesting book 。 Definitely changes your outlook on prison
Matt Jackson
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