Early life trauma leaves us with a broken inner world， and prone to lifelong states of destructiveness， self-hatred， resentment， vengeance and shame。 There is no easy solution but with the help of a skilled other， we can possibly rebuild a sense of inner goodness。 This process follows after recognizing the envy and guilt that drive us to control others and punish ourselves。 Slowly， over time， survivors of severe early trauma may come to mourn， to accept and to live in harmony with others in a st Early life trauma leaves us with a broken inner world， and prone to lifelong states of destructiveness， self-hatred， resentment， vengeance and shame。 There is no easy solution but with the help of a skilled other， we can possibly rebuild a sense of inner goodness。 This process follows after recognizing the envy and guilt that drive us to control others and punish ourselves。 Slowly， over time， survivors of severe early trauma may come to mourn， to accept and to live in harmony with others in a state of gratitude for what yet remains possible。This book draws heavily on neo-Kleinian psychoanalytic approaches and does demand some elementary knowledge of psychoanalysis。Alongside more traditional trauma theory， it offers important perspectives on states of psychic retreat， on the various ways that envy and guilt manifest in clinical work and in life， and on the path back from impasse to development。The author makes a point of the importance of gaze。 As I finished reading his final paragraph， I sensed myself gazing back at him， across continents， offering my respect and appreciation 。。。 and gratitude。 。。。more