Hola Papi: How to Come Out in a Walmart Parking Lot and Other Life Lessons
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- Create Date：2021-06-06 19:31:03
- Update Date：2025-09-07
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- Author：John Paul Brammer
- ISBN：1982141492
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Summary
From popular LGBTQ advice columnist and writer John Paul Brammer comes a hilarious， heartwarming memoir-in-essays chronicling his journey growing up as a queer， mixed-race kid in America’s heartland to becoming the “Chicano Carrie Bradshaw” of his generation。
“I loved ¡Hola Papi！” —Shea Serrano * “An invigorating and vital read。” —R。 Eric Thomas * “We are lucky to live in the era of JP Brammer。” —Alexander Chee * “JP Brammer is the best storyteller。 ” —Heather Havrilesky * “[Brammer is] a beautiful writer。” —Rainbow Rowell * “Essential and necessary。” —Jonny Sun
The first time someone called John Paul （JP） Brammer “Papi” was on the popular gay hookup app Grindr。 At first， it was flattering; JP took this as white-guy speak for “hey， handsome。” Who doesn’t want to be called handsome？ But then it happened again and again…and again， leaving JP wondering: Who the hell is Papi？
What started as a racialized moniker given to him on a hookup app soon became the inspiration for his now wildly popular advice column “¡Hola Papi！，” launching his career as the Cheryl Strayed for young queer people everywhere—and some straight people too。 JP had his doubts at first—what advice could he really offer while he himself stumbled through his early 20s？ Sometimes the best advice to dole outcomes from looking within， which is what JP has done in his column and book—and readers have flocked to him for honest， heartfelt wisdom， and of course， a few laughs。
In ¡Hola Papi！， JP shares his story of growing up biracial and in the closet in America’s heartland， while attempting to answer some of life’s toughest questions: How do I let go of the past？ How do I become the person I want to be？ Is there such a thing as being too gay？ Should I hook up with my grade school bully now that he’s out of the closet？ Questions we’ve all asked ourselves， surely。
With wit and wisdom in equal measure， ¡Hola Papi！ is for anyone—gay， straight， and everything in between—who has ever taken stock of their unique place in the world， offering considered advice， intelligent discourse， and fits of laughter along the way。 “Readers are likely to become addicted to these stories; they’re that good…Brammer comes to know himself very well， and readers will be delighted to make his acquaintance， too，” says Booklist in a starred review。
“I loved ¡Hola Papi！” —Shea Serrano * “An invigorating and vital read。” —R。 Eric Thomas * “We are lucky to live in the era of JP Brammer。” —Alexander Chee * “JP Brammer is the best storyteller。 ” —Heather Havrilesky * “[Brammer is] a beautiful writer。” —Rainbow Rowell * “Essential and necessary。” —Jonny Sun
The first time someone called John Paul （JP） Brammer “Papi” was on the popular gay hookup app Grindr。 At first， it was flattering; JP took this as white-guy speak for “hey， handsome。” Who doesn’t want to be called handsome？ But then it happened again and again…and again， leaving JP wondering: Who the hell is Papi？
What started as a racialized moniker given to him on a hookup app soon became the inspiration for his now wildly popular advice column “¡Hola Papi！，” launching his career as the Cheryl Strayed for young queer people everywhere—and some straight people too。 JP had his doubts at first—what advice could he really offer while he himself stumbled through his early 20s？ Sometimes the best advice to dole outcomes from looking within， which is what JP has done in his column and book—and readers have flocked to him for honest， heartfelt wisdom， and of course， a few laughs。
In ¡Hola Papi！， JP shares his story of growing up biracial and in the closet in America’s heartland， while attempting to answer some of life’s toughest questions: How do I let go of the past？ How do I become the person I want to be？ Is there such a thing as being too gay？ Should I hook up with my grade school bully now that he’s out of the closet？ Questions we’ve all asked ourselves， surely。
With wit and wisdom in equal measure， ¡Hola Papi！ is for anyone—gay， straight， and everything in between—who has ever taken stock of their unique place in the world， offering considered advice， intelligent discourse， and fits of laughter along the way。 “Readers are likely to become addicted to these stories; they’re that good…Brammer comes to know himself very well， and readers will be delighted to make his acquaintance， too，” says Booklist in a starred review。
Reviews
Christian
，
this is quite truly one of the best things I have read。 I have always been in awe of the way JP writes and have been following his advice column since the beginning。 The backstory felt eerily familiar to my own and probably many queer people of color and it’s a story that I’ve related to the first time in my life。 Definitely took part in some of my own reflection。 Truly inspiring and perfect work。 If you are reading reviews to get a feel， just read it。 It is just a beautiful work on being you， h this is quite truly one of the best things I have read。 I have always been in awe of the way JP writes and have been following his advice column since the beginning。 The backstory felt eerily familiar to my own and probably many queer people of color and it’s a story that I’ve related to the first time in my life。 Definitely took part in some of my own reflection。 Truly inspiring and perfect work。 If you are reading reviews to get a feel， just read it。 It is just a beautiful work on being you， healing， and comedy。 。。。more
Melissa
，
Such a heart-warming collection of memoir/essay taken from Brammer's advice column as a jumping off point。 I just wanted to jump into the book and hug tween-John in the essay where he talks about the horrible bullying he experienced， particularly since it originated from a kid he admired and that admiration was twisted with cruelty。There are trigger warnings for bullying， homophobia， discussion of suicide， and racism - since Brammer is recounting these incidents that happened to him， he writes w Such a heart-warming collection of memoir/essay taken from Brammer's advice column as a jumping off point。 I just wanted to jump into the book and hug tween-John in the essay where he talks about the horrible bullying he experienced， particularly since it originated from a kid he admired and that admiration was twisted with cruelty。There are trigger warnings for bullying， homophobia， discussion of suicide， and racism - since Brammer is recounting these incidents that happened to him， he writes with incredible candor and self-awareness about how these things shaped him。 I frequently forgot that he used the advice-column format and was surprised whenever he addressed an advice-seeker。 。。。more
Athena
，
4。5/5I picked this up because I thought it would be light and funny， and while it was funny， it was more introspective than I anticipated （shame on me tbh）。 I loved this book， and I'm so glad I read it。 。。。 And now I'm going to follow the author on Twitter 4。5/5I picked this up because I thought it would be light and funny， and while it was funny， it was more introspective than I anticipated （shame on me tbh）。 I loved this book， and I'm so glad I read it。 。。。 And now I'm going to follow the author on Twitter 。。。more
Danielle
，
Brammer's memoir adopts the style of traditional advice columns， where each chapter addresses a different theme or challenge across the arc of his life。 At first， I wasn't sure how effectively this was going to work out， but it has definitely won me over by the end。 He is an excellent writer and describes his experiences with a perfect balance of bleak millennial humor， introspection， and earnestness。 If you're a queer person， you will find something in this book to relate to。 I certainly did。 Brammer's memoir adopts the style of traditional advice columns， where each chapter addresses a different theme or challenge across the arc of his life。 At first， I wasn't sure how effectively this was going to work out， but it has definitely won me over by the end。 He is an excellent writer and describes his experiences with a perfect balance of bleak millennial humor， introspection， and earnestness。 If you're a queer person， you will find something in this book to relate to。 I certainly did。 。。。more
Krysten
，
I am very， very grateful for this book that has come out while Mercury is in retrograde in Gemini （iykyk）。 I could not have loved or needed it more。 Thank you， for living through a middle school experience exactly the same yet totally different from mine。 Thank you for a version of ¡Hola Papi！ I can physically hold and look at on my bookshelf and think about。 I am going to remember how I cried， and how someone might have needed to hear me。
Joey Rajewski
，
Brammer wears his heart on his sleeve in this deeply personal memoir。 Sharing stories with humor & compassion， Brammers' insights in family， race， sex， and fetish are unique & relatable to each of us。 Thanks to Libro。fm for the free audio。 A great listen/read during pride month。 Brammer wears his heart on his sleeve in this deeply personal memoir。 Sharing stories with humor & compassion， Brammers' insights in family， race， sex， and fetish are unique & relatable to each of us。 Thanks to Libro。fm for the free audio。 A great listen/read during pride month。 。。。more
Vanessa
，
This was solidly ok。 It is basically a memoir written by an advice column writer， whose audience （I believe） is predominantly gay males。 He honestly just seemed like just about every guy I know and like in my own life， which is good， but at the same time there wasn't really anything Earth shattering about this。 I do really love the cover。I received an ARC from the publisher via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review。 This was solidly ok。 It is basically a memoir written by an advice column writer， whose audience （I believe） is predominantly gay males。 He honestly just seemed like just about every guy I know and like in my own life， which is good， but at the same time there wasn't really anything Earth shattering about this。 I do really love the cover。I received an ARC from the publisher via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review。 。。。more
Vangosh
，
First I would like to say that I ADORE the format of Hola Papi！: How to Come out in a Walmart Parking Lot and Other Life Lessons。 It was very clever placing the reader questions at the beginning and the way he addresses the reader （us！） through each chapter feels like a conversation between two friends。 He invites you in and converses the topic through his story to a possible conclusion。 Not every question was meant for me but the over-reaching themes can apply to everyone。 I was able to find a First I would like to say that I ADORE the format of Hola Papi！: How to Come out in a Walmart Parking Lot and Other Life Lessons。 It was very clever placing the reader questions at the beginning and the way he addresses the reader （us！） through each chapter feels like a conversation between two friends。 He invites you in and converses the topic through his story to a possible conclusion。 Not every question was meant for me but the over-reaching themes can apply to everyone。 I was able to find a nugget from each chapter that I could relate to my life。 Something to keep in mind is that Hola Papi！ tackles a lot of difficult subjects （including bullying and suicidal intentions） but John Paul’s humor doesn’t let you get bogged down for too long。 I was captivated by his stories and left feeling hopeful。 Hola Papi！ was so easy to read that it took no time at all to finish it。 I felt like the book could be infinitely longer （and I wish it was！）。 John Paul has a beautiful way of telling a story and his stories are deceptively thought provoking！ I haven’t had a book challenge me in a long time。 I have a feeling that I will be thinking about this book and picking it up to reread different chapters or the whole book often！ This was a great book to kick off pride month！Thank you to Net Galley and the publisher for an arc of this book！ 。。。more
Heather K （dentist in my spare time）
，
As someone who has never read John Paul Brammer's advice column， I was pleasantly surprised by Hola Papi: How to Come Out in a Walmart Parking Lot and Other Life Lessons。 It was heartfelt， funny， introspective， and well-written， and though I would have loved a more linear format of storytelling， I really enjoyed the book。 Hola Papi: How to Come Out in a Walmart Parking Lot and Other Life Lessons is a collection of John Paul Brammer's selected advice columns the speak on cultural and racial ident As someone who has never read John Paul Brammer's advice column， I was pleasantly surprised by Hola Papi: How to Come Out in a Walmart Parking Lot and Other Life Lessons。 It was heartfelt， funny， introspective， and well-written， and though I would have loved a more linear format of storytelling， I really enjoyed the book。 Hola Papi: How to Come Out in a Walmart Parking Lot and Other Life Lessons is a collection of John Paul Brammer's selected advice columns the speak on cultural and racial identity， being queer and smart in an intolerant， rural town， and the pain of love and loss。 I could relate， personally， to very few of those elements on a superficial basis， but I felt his words profoundly and I think the book will connect particularly well with queer millennial-aged readers。 Parts of this book are funny and light， and parts of the story make you ache in a bone-deep way。 I wanted to reach back in time to hug John Paul Brammer numerous times。 Some of the essays made me want more of a conclusion to a particular story， but I was very pleased with what I got。 John Paul Brammer is a talented writer， and Hola Papi: How to Come Out in a Walmart Parking Lot and Other Life Lessons is a great read for those who want a well-rounded collection of personally essays and stories。 *Copy provided in exchange for an honest review*goodreads|instagram|twitter|blog 。。。more
emmy ;
，
**an arc was provided by Simon and Schuster via NetGalleyI had been following Brammer on Twitter for a while when I learned he would be publishing a book。 It was mid-March， and I don't know how I had missed all his previous posts announcing this， but I finally became away of this book's existence。 I knew he had an advice column， the inspiration for the format of this book， but I'd never perused the pieces。 I was enamored enough with his tweeting style to know I needed to read this because I knew **an arc was provided by Simon and Schuster via NetGalleyI had been following Brammer on Twitter for a while when I learned he would be publishing a book。 It was mid-March， and I don't know how I had missed all his previous posts announcing this， but I finally became away of this book's existence。 I knew he had an advice column， the inspiration for the format of this book， but I'd never perused the pieces。 I was enamored enough with his tweeting style to know I needed to read this because I knew already that I would love it。And I was so very right。As a whole， this book is delightful。 In parts， it is also equally delightful。 I can easily imagine a future version of me with a physical copy， sitting down and reading one chapter at a time。 Some of the chapters were similar （which is why they're in a collection together）， which lent to taking breaks between reading。 If I were to read it all in one sitting， I perhaps would have gotten bored （I doubt it， because the prose is simply that entertaining）。 It's like a mixed bag of treats that you get to sit down and enjoy， with some sweeter than others and some small enough you encourage yourself to have just one more。Looking at the advice column after reading this book， it's easy to see how it was pared down to better match the format of a collection of essays。 The advice column features long letters from readers， while the book itself opens each 'chapter' with a short and sweet sentence with the same idea behind it: a question seeking advice， just with slightly less backstory。 Some chapters felt long， some were long but felt short， and some were simply short， but they all did what they needed to do: share an anecdote to answer the opening question， and they all did it beautifully。Despite not being "a Twitter-addled gay Mexican with anxiety" （taken from the bolded opening of Brammer's posts on his Substack blog/newsletter）， I still found this book to be relatable in numerous。 Personally， I connect most whenever he delved into his anxieties about being a writer for a living。 As much as I related to the worry of not being， I found hope in that I was reading something this person—so full of worries—was getting published。 It was like a silhouette of my future had become tangible and handheld。 Even still， this collection of essays helped me in ways I didn't anticipate。 It inspired me to keep writing， inspired me to write more personal things about myself， inspired me to reflect and consider things in ways I hadn't previously。I would recommend this book to anyone: those already a fan of Brammer's work， those who like to read nonfiction essays， those looking for a book in a genre they may not normally read。 Excited for this book to be published！ 。。。more
Ignacio Torres
，
"Love is nothing without fiction。 It's a story， and like any story it can be told well or told poorly。。。 I was in love once。 I was happy to be in love。 I was sad for a while when I wasn't。 I'm glad it happened， and that it's over。 I do hope it happens again。"Need I say more？ "Love is nothing without fiction。 It's a story， and like any story it can be told well or told poorly。。。 I was in love once。 I was happy to be in love。 I was sad for a while when I wasn't。 I'm glad it happened， and that it's over。 I do hope it happens again。"Need I say more？ 。。。more
Carla （literary。infatuation）
，
I devoured this book， I couldn’t put it down but I didn’t want it to end。 Brammer is not only a great charming writer， but he comes across as funny， vulnerable， open and so real and what else can you ask for in a memoir？
Linda Quinn
，
An honest and real memoir-in-essays that covers some universal themes of love and identity through the eyes of a gay Mexican American man。
Candice
，
Can I just say that ¡Hola Papi！ by the wickedly talented @jpbrammer is the very， VERY perfect collection of essays for lazy summer days？Raw， blatantly vulnerable， thoroughly honest， deeply funny at times， I truly just adored every single page of this book。 @jpbrammer is insanely talented at making you feel like you’re best friends， out shooting the s*** about how to navigate all of life’s twists and turns。 He so gorgeously he weaves the stories of his own life into nuggets of wisdom that could b Can I just say that ¡Hola Papi！ by the wickedly talented @jpbrammer is the very， VERY perfect collection of essays for lazy summer days？Raw， blatantly vulnerable， thoroughly honest， deeply funny at times， I truly just adored every single page of this book。 @jpbrammer is insanely talented at making you feel like you’re best friends， out shooting the s*** about how to navigate all of life’s twists and turns。 He so gorgeously he weaves the stories of his own life into nuggets of wisdom that could be applied far and wide for anyone who is struggling trying to find their own path。 I feel all the most inspired and thoughtful having spent some time with this book， and it will be a favourite to enjoy for a long， long time to come。Thank you @simonschusterca for sharing this copy of magnificent joy with me。 I cannot tell you enough how you need to have this on your wish list， when this drops in June - your summer is NOT going to be complete without this book in your heart。Besides， you need something that pairs perfectly with early morning sunshine and sweet， lazy days。 。。。more
Alexis （hookedtobooks）
，
Thank you Simon and Schuster Canada for the copy of this book。-Read if you like: funny but reflective essays。-Essays that are written in the style of advice columns， this book is based off of the column that Brammer used to write called "Hola Papi。" In these essays， Brammer explores his personal experiences in middle school， coming out as gay， unhealthy relationships， as well as his exploration of his own identity。-This book made me laugh and cry， which is honestly what I want to get out of read Thank you Simon and Schuster Canada for the copy of this book。-Read if you like: funny but reflective essays。-Essays that are written in the style of advice columns， this book is based off of the column that Brammer used to write called "Hola Papi。" In these essays， Brammer explores his personal experiences in middle school， coming out as gay， unhealthy relationships， as well as his exploration of his own identity。-This book made me laugh and cry， which is honestly what I want to get out of reading essays！-CW: homophobia， racism， bullying， sexual harassment and assault。 。。。more
Hermione
，
Delightful， heartfelt， hilarious， bittersweet， and sometimes heartbreaking。 I really enjoyed this book。 I loved the authors voice as it came off the page， and I loved the honest way he approached different aspects of life and it's sometimes all too hard lessons， and I loved his stories about his experiences。 Thank you Simon & Schuster for the ARC of this book for review。 Delightful， heartfelt， hilarious， bittersweet， and sometimes heartbreaking。 I really enjoyed this book。 I loved the authors voice as it came off the page， and I loved the honest way he approached different aspects of life and it's sometimes all too hard lessons， and I loved his stories about his experiences。 Thank you Simon & Schuster for the ARC of this book for review。 。。。more
Taylor
，
Stunning。 Hilarious。 I’m a big fan of JP’s work and this did not disappoint。 He takes a brutally honest， introspective look at himself， internalized homophobia， race and identity， and the desire to be loved and neatly wraps it in this gorgeous collection of stories。
Guillermo Perez
，
Just finished this ARC copy of @jpbrammer upcoming book Hola Papi！ And I loved it for so many reasons！ John Paul writes stories that are so relatable and I found myself nodding along and wondering how he managed to write essays about me？ 🤣•if you’ve ever been bullied •been ghosted •wondered if you were doing the right thing •felt lost and hopeless•felt found and brazen •felt fashionably unfashionable •felt ugly and got all at once •fallen in love with the idea of loveThen this is the book for yo Just finished this ARC copy of @jpbrammer upcoming book Hola Papi！ And I loved it for so many reasons！ John Paul writes stories that are so relatable and I found myself nodding along and wondering how he managed to write essays about me？ 🤣•if you’ve ever been bullied •been ghosted •wondered if you were doing the right thing •felt lost and hopeless•felt found and brazen •felt fashionably unfashionable •felt ugly and got all at once •fallen in love with the idea of loveThen this is the book for you！ MARK YOUR CALENDARS “Hola Papi！” Is out 6/8/2021 💜💃🏽 。。。more
Paige Armstrong
，
This book is a delight。 John Paul Brammer writes in earnest with self-awareness and openness。 He's navigating what it's like to be queer， to be Mexican， to be young， and to be a writer。 He writes about cultural crossroads and how to be "enough" of anything。 The stories he lays out in his advice letters feel honest and raw， and I think the world will be better for him having shared them。 I relate to a lot of what he has written， so I'm thankful for this book。 This book is a delight。 John Paul Brammer writes in earnest with self-awareness and openness。 He's navigating what it's like to be queer， to be Mexican， to be young， and to be a writer。 He writes about cultural crossroads and how to be "enough" of anything。 The stories he lays out in his advice letters feel honest and raw， and I think the world will be better for him having shared them。 I relate to a lot of what he has written， so I'm thankful for this book。 。。。more
Kelly
，
Buckle up for an emotional， personal， devastating and humorous journey in Hola Papi: How to Come Out in a Walmart Parking Lot and Other Life Lessons， by John Paul Brammer。 Brammer pivots from his career as a popular LGBTQ Advice-Columnist to penning his memoir-in-essays about life lessons growing up as a mixed-race， gay young man in America's Heartland。 You're in good hands as Brammer invites the reader along amid his personal odyssey。 John Paul is struggling to figure out how to "be"， as in。。。H Buckle up for an emotional， personal， devastating and humorous journey in Hola Papi: How to Come Out in a Walmart Parking Lot and Other Life Lessons， by John Paul Brammer。 Brammer pivots from his career as a popular LGBTQ Advice-Columnist to penning his memoir-in-essays about life lessons growing up as a mixed-race， gay young man in America's Heartland。 You're in good hands as Brammer invites the reader along amid his personal odyssey。 John Paul is struggling to figure out how to "be"， as in。。。How to be "gay"How to be "ethnic" How to be in loveHow to find authenticityHow to love himself。These are universal experiences and you'll find yourself connecting with the author and cheering him on along the way。I loved the '“Chicano Carrie Bradshaw” of his generation' and can't wait to see what he writes next！Thank you NetGalley for an ARC in exchange for an honest review。This is a Simon & Schuster publication and is set to be released on June 8， 2021。 。。。more
Melissa
，
Found this one fascinating
Kristen
，
A breathlessly good memoir。
Shane
，
I was provided an e-ARC from Netgalley。 This book surprised me。 I only know the author from following him on twitter and obviously that's a terrible platform to get a 'real' idea of a person， but I assumed this book would be on the pithier side。 A good smattering of self deprecating humor， maybe。 Instead， the stories felt very real and raw and containing a lot of heavy topics that were handled with care。 I particularly liked the chapters where he reflected on pain as a metric for authenticity。 I I was provided an e-ARC from Netgalley。 This book surprised me。 I only know the author from following him on twitter and obviously that's a terrible platform to get a 'real' idea of a person， but I assumed this book would be on the pithier side。 A good smattering of self deprecating humor， maybe。 Instead， the stories felt very real and raw and containing a lot of heavy topics that were handled with care。 I particularly liked the chapters where he reflected on pain as a metric for authenticity。 I think that's an issue that's really been escalating in our society。 I don't know how to fix it， but I would at least like it acknowledged。 。。。more
Kerry
，
I absolutely loved this book！ I was rooting for the author the whole time。 Growing up gay in small town America isn't easy （we have that in common）， but I felt so much pride and happiness as I got to see how he survived， and how he learned to thrive。 Now， I want to write to Papi！ I absolutely loved this book！ I was rooting for the author the whole time。 Growing up gay in small town America isn't easy （we have that in common）， but I felt so much pride and happiness as I got to see how he survived， and how he learned to thrive。 Now， I want to write to Papi！ 。。。more
Lori
，
Thank you NetGalley for the ARC。 This quick and insightful read will stay with you long after you finish this book。
Colin
，
From the first chapter， this book is funny， charming， and chirpy， and I immensely enjoyed this “memoir-in-essays”。 The author is hysterical。 Case in point， in a confrontation with his grandmother:“Shee，” Abuela said to me， another favorite term of hers。 I never figured out if she was shortening the word “shit” or mispronouncing “gee。” This caused me roucous laughter in the moment。These little aside nuggets are littered all throughout this book， conversationally， not forced。 It’s the style that C From the first chapter， this book is funny， charming， and chirpy， and I immensely enjoyed this “memoir-in-essays”。 The author is hysterical。 Case in point， in a confrontation with his grandmother:“Shee，” Abuela said to me， another favorite term of hers。 I never figured out if she was shortening the word “shit” or mispronouncing “gee。” This caused me roucous laughter in the moment。These little aside nuggets are littered all throughout this book， conversationally， not forced。 It’s the style that Chasten Buttegieg was aiming for in his memoir but didn’t execute quite nearly as well。 His skill as an advice columnist is evident - funny， captivating， and his insight powerfully potent。Overall， very funny， engaging， insightful - enjoyable overall， one I'd highly recommend。Thank you to Simon & Schuster and NetGalley for providing me with an ARC。 。。。more
PL
，
This is a riveting， engaging book of essays by LGBTQ+ advice columnist John Paul Bremmer。 The chapters are divided and formatted as answers to advice seekers。 This works quite well， as you are drawn in as a reader and it feels very much like the author is speaking directly to you。 It felt warm， engaging， conversational。 Bremmer's writing draws you in。 I appreciate his voice as an author--there is an honesty and a vulnerability to it that allows you to understand his experiences but also relate t This is a riveting， engaging book of essays by LGBTQ+ advice columnist John Paul Bremmer。 The chapters are divided and formatted as answers to advice seekers。 This works quite well， as you are drawn in as a reader and it feels very much like the author is speaking directly to you。 It felt warm， engaging， conversational。 Bremmer's writing draws you in。 I appreciate his voice as an author--there is an honesty and a vulnerability to it that allows you to understand his experiences but also relate them to your own， in a conversational， accessible way。 There are some heavy topics addressed in this collection of essays but there are so many light-hearted moments and amusing anecdotes as well。 I enjoyed reading this book。 The time flew by as I did。 He tells his story of being a gay Mexican-American growing up in Oklahoma in a series of essays that each focus on one important question。 His answers dig deep and he reveals so much of himself in the narrative。 His hopes， his dreams， his aspirations， his questioning himself， his darkest moments， his struggles to find his way， the challenge of fitting in， the road to being true to himself。 Readers will empathize， sympathize， see themselves in his stories。 The questions and essays are so relatable， whatever demographic you find yourself in。 Some will resonate more than others but all are pertinent。 This was truly a delight to read。 I look forward to more from JP Brammer。 This was an important book for me to read and it has left me with many thoughts on his words and experience。Highly recommended。Overall rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️My thanks to netgalley and the publisher for the digital ARC。 This is my honest review。 。。。more
Beauregard
，
This essay collection is charming， heartfelt， and frequently funny。 If you enjoy Brammer's regular column you will probably enjoy this book！ I found myself highlighting many different parts。 The first three essays are absolutely incredible， but I found the rest of the book less engaging。 Definitely still good， but not as much as the first part of the book。Thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for a free eARC in exchange for my honest review。 This essay collection is charming， heartfelt， and frequently funny。 If you enjoy Brammer's regular column you will probably enjoy this book！ I found myself highlighting many different parts。 The first three essays are absolutely incredible， but I found the rest of the book less engaging。 Definitely still good， but not as much as the first part of the book。Thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for a free eARC in exchange for my honest review。 。。。more
Stacey
，
I received an ARC of this book for an honest review。 had no experience with this author-had never read his advice column or seen any of his artwork so I had no preconceived notions of his work。 What a beautiful， delightful surprise for me to read this book！ I love his voice-his ability to share his experiences in an authentic way and yet still let you read your own experiences in his advice。 I love how he encourages everyone to understand that their story doesn't have to end with the things that I received an ARC of this book for an honest review。 had no experience with this author-had never read his advice column or seen any of his artwork so I had no preconceived notions of his work。 What a beautiful， delightful surprise for me to read this book！ I love his voice-his ability to share his experiences in an authentic way and yet still let you read your own experiences in his advice。 I love how he encourages everyone to understand that their story doesn't have to end with the things that have happened to them-that we can acknowledge them as just part of our story， not the end of our story。 There is so much power in that advice。 。。。more
Susie Dumond
，