The Perfectionist's Guide to Losing Control: A Path to Peace and Power
- Downloads：6773
- Type：Epub+TxT+PDF+Mobi
- Create Date：2023-01-20 10:21:31
- Update Date：2025-09-07
- Status：finish
- Author：Katherine Morgan Schafler
- ISBN：B09Y554KWL
- Environment：PC/Android/iPhone/iPad/Kindle
- Download
Summary
From psychotherapist Katherine Morgan Schafler， an invitation to every "recovering perfectionist" to challenge the way they look at perfectionism， and the way they look at themselves。
We've been looking at perfectionism all wrong。 As psychotherapist and former on-site therapist at Google Katherine Morgan Schafler argues in The Perfectionist's Guide to Losing Control， you don't have to stop being a perfectionist to be healthy。 For women who are sick of being given the generic advice to "find balance，" a new approach has arrived。
Which of the five types of perfectionist are you？ Classic， intense， Parisian， messy， or procrastinator？ As you identify your unique perfectionist profile， you'll learn how to manage each form of perfectionism to work for you， not against you。 Beyond managing it， you'll learn how to embrace and even enjoy your perfectionism。 Yes， enjoy！
Full of stories and brimming with humor， empathy， and depth， this book is a love letter to the ambitious， high achieving， full-of-life clients who filled the author's private practice， and who changed her life。 It's a clarion call for all women to dare to want more without feeling greedy or ungrateful。 Ultimately， this book will show you how to make the single greatest trade you'll ever make in your life， which is to exchange superficial control for real power。
We've been looking at perfectionism all wrong。 As psychotherapist and former on-site therapist at Google Katherine Morgan Schafler argues in The Perfectionist's Guide to Losing Control， you don't have to stop being a perfectionist to be healthy。 For women who are sick of being given the generic advice to "find balance，" a new approach has arrived。
Which of the five types of perfectionist are you？ Classic， intense， Parisian， messy， or procrastinator？ As you identify your unique perfectionist profile， you'll learn how to manage each form of perfectionism to work for you， not against you。 Beyond managing it， you'll learn how to embrace and even enjoy your perfectionism。 Yes， enjoy！
Full of stories and brimming with humor， empathy， and depth， this book is a love letter to the ambitious， high achieving， full-of-life clients who filled the author's private practice， and who changed her life。 It's a clarion call for all women to dare to want more without feeling greedy or ungrateful。 Ultimately， this book will show you how to make the single greatest trade you'll ever make in your life， which is to exchange superficial control for real power。
Reviews
Anna
，
I received a net galley of this book because I interviewed the author for my podcast。 I was blown away by how affected by this book I was and how helpful I found it。 There are incredible insights， and tons of very practical guidance。 I was surprised by how validated I felt by a lot of the book and how much language it gave to experiences I've had。 I've read this quote out to multiple friends who were also shocked by how accurate it felt， "We broadcast implicit gender-performance expectations by I received a net galley of this book because I interviewed the author for my podcast。 I was blown away by how affected by this book I was and how helpful I found it。 There are incredible insights， and tons of very practical guidance。 I was surprised by how validated I felt by a lot of the book and how much language it gave to experiences I've had。 I've read this quote out to multiple friends who were also shocked by how accurate it felt， "We broadcast implicit gender-performance expectations by nestling them into everyday language （i。e。， “working mom”）。 Language also serves a regulatory function by reinforcing said expectations through varying degrees of punishment and reward， including the “reward” of no punishment。 For example， deviating from implicit gender-performance expectations of appearing to be a healthy， balanced woman brands you a “hot mess” （a punishment）。 Incorporating gratuitous exclamation points into your email etiquette means no one can call you a “bitch” （the “reward” of no punishment）。Yes， there are women who subvert gender-performance expectations to successfully gain industry respect and power， but these women do so at tremendous personal and professional cost—not at tremendous risk; the risk is bypassed into immediate cost" 。。。more
Sara
，
"Interestingly （read: predictably）， the push towards curbing perfectionism and being ‘perfectly imperfect’ is directed towards women。 Have you ever heard a man refer to himself as a “recovering perfectionist？” When Steve Jobs or Gordon Ramsey or James Cameron demand perfection， they’re exalted as geniuses in their respective fields。 Where are the celebrated female perfectionists？ 。。。 。 Part of the urging to stamp out perfectionism in women arises because perfectionism is a powerful energy。""Wome "Interestingly （read: predictably）， the push towards curbing perfectionism and being ‘perfectly imperfect’ is directed towards women。 Have you ever heard a man refer to himself as a “recovering perfectionist？” When Steve Jobs or Gordon Ramsey or James Cameron demand perfection， they’re exalted as geniuses in their respective fields。 Where are the celebrated female perfectionists？ 。。。 。 Part of the urging to stamp out perfectionism in women arises because perfectionism is a powerful energy。""Women receive an eternal fountain of directives every day about how to be less。 How to weigh less， how to want less， how to be less emotional， how to say ‘yes’ less， and certainly how to be less of a perfectionist。 This is a book about more。 About how to get more of what you want by being more of who you are。" 。。。more
Lily Rooke
，
I truly can't recommend this book highly enough。 Written by a psychotherapist， The Perfectionist's Guide to Losing Control reframes perfectionism as something much more insidious than quirky， providing a deep dive into five different subtypes while questioning the elusive concept of 'finding balance' through a gently anti-capitalist/patriarchal lens。 The author draws on a lot of stories， all with female clients， so the language sometimes feels less inclusive than it could have been， although the I truly can't recommend this book highly enough。 Written by a psychotherapist， The Perfectionist's Guide to Losing Control reframes perfectionism as something much more insidious than quirky， providing a deep dive into five different subtypes while questioning the elusive concept of 'finding balance' through a gently anti-capitalist/patriarchal lens。 The author draws on a lot of stories， all with female clients， so the language sometimes feels less inclusive than it could have been， although the author does make the point in a footnote that this is for brevity and convenience， so I think if cis male or other trans spec readers went into the book with this mindset they would gain just as much。 I respect that the author took the approach of staying in her lane and recommended other texts where appropriate。 Personally， I felt the blurb sells the book as something a little more pop culture-y than it actually is on the page。 I would encourage readers who identify with the extreme struggles detailed in the book to work through their insight and growth with the support of a therapist。 I felt like this was more an accessible academic text， rather than an easy self-help beach read。 If you're in the right place at the right time in your mental health journey， I have no doubt this book will offer a great deal of healing。 I have definitely felt a change， like the things I've been working towards over many years alone and with intense therapy for twelve months have crystalised with the help of this book。 I want to re-read it regularly， and I intend to purchase my own copy as soon as possible。 Bring on the tears and 'sudden' moments of clarity and understanding。disclaimer: I received an ARC of this book from Penguin Group Portfolio via NetGalley， and I am voluntarily leaving this honest review。 。。。more
Skye
，
3 stars， not roundedThis book is a good starting point for a discussion about perfectionism and some societal issues surrounding women's mental health， but I found it to be a bit lacking in follow-through。 The book does this on purpose， to be clear。 The author explicitly says the book will not give you exercises and homework and other things of the sort to "perfect" the very personal experience of growth。 However， it did leave me feeling a bit unsatisfied。 The beginning of the book started off s 3 stars， not roundedThis book is a good starting point for a discussion about perfectionism and some societal issues surrounding women's mental health， but I found it to be a bit lacking in follow-through。 The book does this on purpose， to be clear。 The author explicitly says the book will not give you exercises and homework and other things of the sort to "perfect" the very personal experience of growth。 However， it did leave me feeling a bit unsatisfied。 The beginning of the book started off so strong that I didn't heed the author's warning when I should have。For the future me that will read this review， the book has a lot of great quotes， and I definitely plan to look back through it in the future to find some of them。 。。。more
Sarah
，