Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself
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- Type：Epub+TxT+PDF+Mobi
- Create Date：2022-04-22 00:21:36
- Update Date：2025-09-06
- Status：finish
- Author：Melody Beattie
- ISBN：0894864025
- Environment：PC/Android/iPhone/iPad/Kindle
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Summary
The healing touchstone of millions， this modern classic by one of America's best-loved and most inspirational authors holds the key to understanding codependency and to unlocking its stultifying hold on your life。
Is someone else's problem your problem？ If， like so many others， you've lost sight of your own life in the drama of tending to someone else's， you may be codependent--and you may find yourself in this book--Codependent No More。The healing touchstone of millions， this modern classic by one of America's best-loved and most inspirational authors holds the key to understanding codependency and to unlocking its stultifying hold on your life。With instructive life stories， personal reflections， exercises， and self-tests， Codependent No More is a simple， straightforward， readable map of the perplexing world of codependency--charting the path to freedom and a lifetime of healing， hope， and happiness。Melody Beattie is the author of Beyond Codependency， The Language of Letting Go， Stop Being Mean to Yourself， The Codependent No More Workbook and Playing It by Heart。
Is someone else's problem your problem？ If， like so many others， you've lost sight of your own life in the drama of tending to someone else's， you may be codependent--and you may find yourself in this book--Codependent No More。The healing touchstone of millions， this modern classic by one of America's best-loved and most inspirational authors holds the key to understanding codependency and to unlocking its stultifying hold on your life。With instructive life stories， personal reflections， exercises， and self-tests， Codependent No More is a simple， straightforward， readable map of the perplexing world of codependency--charting the path to freedom and a lifetime of healing， hope， and happiness。Melody Beattie is the author of Beyond Codependency， The Language of Letting Go， Stop Being Mean to Yourself， The Codependent No More Workbook and Playing It by Heart。
Reviews
Amelia
，
I think this book can be very helpful for people experiencing codependency in alcohol/drug-abuse relationship dynamics， or people of the Christian faith （or people with this intersection）， but it was less helpful for me。I found the insistence on 12-step programs to be overbearing。 As someone who identifies as having codependent behaviors， but isn't currently in a dynamic with an alcoholic， many parts of this book were unrelatable for me。 I have a hard time with books that heavily insist on the C I think this book can be very helpful for people experiencing codependency in alcohol/drug-abuse relationship dynamics， or people of the Christian faith （or people with this intersection）， but it was less helpful for me。I found the insistence on 12-step programs to be overbearing。 As someone who identifies as having codependent behaviors， but isn't currently in a dynamic with an alcoholic， many parts of this book were unrelatable for me。 I have a hard time with books that heavily insist on the Christian God's hand as an integral part of healing， and faith being salvation， which this book tends to do。 3/5 ⭐ because I found this book only mildly helpful for me， but see how it could be helpful to someone else。 。。。more
Vyn
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The chapter on anger was great！
Shannon
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got 75% the way through， and couldn't finish it。 got 75% the way through， and couldn't finish it。 。。。more
Shalonda Archibald
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This book gave me a different perspective on codependency。
Becky
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This book pairs well， in some ways， with A Radical Awakening: Turn Pain into Power， Embrace Your Truth， Live Free， as both books highly encourage the reader to pay attention to their own behavior and let others take care of their own life。 So this was full of good reminders in that vein。 This book was also very much written for people struggling with addiction or who have family members who struggle with addiction。 A worthwhile read。 This book pairs well， in some ways， with A Radical Awakening: Turn Pain into Power， Embrace Your Truth， Live Free， as both books highly encourage the reader to pay attention to their own behavior and let others take care of their own life。 So this was full of good reminders in that vein。 This book was also very much written for people struggling with addiction or who have family members who struggle with addiction。 A worthwhile read。 。。。more
Mermaid Harmony
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Oh。 Wow。 Must read。 Didn't know this was me till I read the book。 Oh。 Wow。 Must read。 Didn't know this was me till I read the book。 。。。more
Nicole Sampson
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This book is full of great advice。 It teaches you what codependency is and how to stop being codependent if you are。 I learned so much。
Heaven 🪷
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I don’t know why but I could not bring myself to finish this book， as you can see by the date I first started it。 I got 69% done and didn’t enjoy it as much。 I tried to talk myself into finishing but I just didn’t。 Maybe it’s partially because I was looking for a codependency book based more so on romantic codependent behaviors whereas if I remember correctly， this one emphasizes alcoholism and drugs。 Maybe one day， but for now， this isn’t one I can see myself finishing。 If this works for you， g I don’t know why but I could not bring myself to finish this book， as you can see by the date I first started it。 I got 69% done and didn’t enjoy it as much。 I tried to talk myself into finishing but I just didn’t。 Maybe it’s partially because I was looking for a codependency book based more so on romantic codependent behaviors whereas if I remember correctly， this one emphasizes alcoholism and drugs。 Maybe one day， but for now， this isn’t one I can see myself finishing。 If this works for you， great！ Nothing against this book， but it wasn’t exactly what I was looking for。 。。。more
becca crisp
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required reading before interacting with me
Wendy
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This book needs a good update。 It was super dated and pretty narrow in it's application， but it was a decent intro to help me understand what codependency is and some of its causes。 This book needs a good update。 It was super dated and pretty narrow in it's application， but it was a decent intro to help me understand what codependency is and some of its causes。 。。。more
Sydney Maureen
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This was recommended to me by my therapist and it was so applicable to my life I had to stop a few times and stare at nothing like I was in The Office。 There are a few parts that I feel are a bit dated （namely the wife typically taking on the homemaker role）， but the message is clear and timeless。 I’m glad I bought the book so that I can go back and reread different portions。 The narrator for the audiobook was very good， she had a way of reading it that made you feel like you were having a conve This was recommended to me by my therapist and it was so applicable to my life I had to stop a few times and stare at nothing like I was in The Office。 There are a few parts that I feel are a bit dated （namely the wife typically taking on the homemaker role）， but the message is clear and timeless。 I’m glad I bought the book so that I can go back and reread different portions。 The narrator for the audiobook was very good， she had a way of reading it that made you feel like you were having a conversation with a friend。 And the author herself is not only knowledgeable when it comes to codependency and chemical addiction， but can speak from personal experience on both sides。 Even if you don’t have someone in your life who is actively dependent on an addictive substance （I don’t）， this is helpful for anyone who has been through any kind of trauma， all types of people pleasers， and pretty much everyone you’ve ever come across。 I highly recommend it。 。。。more
Karsyn Terry
，
This book is truly a gem。 Even if your experiences with codependency fall on the less severe side like mine do， Beattie offers so many solutions to immediately implement。 Each chapter provides an activity to assist you along the way。 I also really enjoyed the comforting tone in the writing style— as much as it felt like a difficult and intense therapy session， the text is written like a conversation with a friend who is genuinely looking out for your well-being。 I underlined so much throughout m This book is truly a gem。 Even if your experiences with codependency fall on the less severe side like mine do， Beattie offers so many solutions to immediately implement。 Each chapter provides an activity to assist you along the way。 I also really enjoyed the comforting tone in the writing style— as much as it felt like a difficult and intense therapy session， the text is written like a conversation with a friend who is genuinely looking out for your well-being。 I underlined so much throughout my reading， and I believe this book can be transformative for many people。 I highly recommend for anyone struggling with characteristics of codependent behavior， no matter how minor or severe。 。。。more
Lindsey
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Mainly focused on those living with alcoholics and Al- Anon。 But it has some really spot on nuggets of wisdom about codependent people and why we might have developed the habits we have。
Sowmya Shashidhara
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Beautiful。。 Beautiful。。 I feel so nurtured when I read what she writes。 I'm speechless beyond this。 Thank you for this book。 Beautiful。。 Beautiful。。 I feel so nurtured when I read what she writes。 I'm speechless beyond this。 Thank you for this book。 。。。more
Callen McMillian
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This book had some good pieces and I liked the emphasis on self-care， and self-loyalty。 However， the unnecessary immersion into Christian ideology， was unhelpful and took me out of the main focus of the book。 It also uses the o slur for fat people。
Amanda Harbin
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Ooof …I did not want to own some of these truths。 The language is outdated but the content has relevance。
Pali
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I would give 4。5 stars。 Very good if you find yourself trying to help others too much， feeling like a martyr for that and having other boundaries issues。Many people especially in some professions where you help others might benefit greatly from this。Also is you feel that you have to 'save' o 'fix' your partner。 This book is exactly for you。Warning : The problem might be you。 I would give 4。5 stars。 Very good if you find yourself trying to help others too much， feeling like a martyr for that and having other boundaries issues。Many people especially in some professions where you help others might benefit greatly from this。Also is you feel that you have to 'save' o 'fix' your partner。 This book is exactly for you。Warning : The problem might be you。 。。。more
Natasha Shields
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Just a lot of weird religious indoctrination but I think has helped me not take things so personally。 Had to ignore a lot of shit
Becky
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I thought this book was good but somewhat redundant as well。 It presented important ideas and opinions but also at the same time was very limited in many examples to people in close relationships with those who suffer with alcoholism specifically。 I think it's very helpful for that group of people but otherwise is a little bit difficult to relate to for a lot of it。 I thought this book was good but somewhat redundant as well。 It presented important ideas and opinions but also at the same time was very limited in many examples to people in close relationships with those who suffer with alcoholism specifically。 I think it's very helpful for that group of people but otherwise is a little bit difficult to relate to for a lot of it。 。。。more
Sarah Sherrill
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The girls that get it get it
Ally Ang
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2。5 stars。 This book is geared towards people in romantic relationships with alcoholics so it wasn’t super relevant to me but I still found it useful for examining certain codependent patterns and behaviors in myself。 It’s very outdated though。
Cari
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While this is really rooted in relationships with alcoholics， this book is really applicable to anyone who has been in or is currently in a relationship with someone who struggles with compulsive behaviors or any addiction。 It won't solve all your problems， but it does help to give perspective。 While this is really rooted in relationships with alcoholics， this book is really applicable to anyone who has been in or is currently in a relationship with someone who struggles with compulsive behaviors or any addiction。 It won't solve all your problems， but it does help to give perspective。 。。。more
Lore Velazquez
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Es un libro de ayuda， obvio no te resuelve el problema pero te abre los ojos a una enfermedad que es un problema grave， yo descubrí que la tengo， me identifiqué y si bien no me liberó de todo al menos me hizo abrir los ojos y a comprender mejor de donde vienen ciertos comportamientos míos。 Es como una luz de esperanza para saber hacia donde enfocarte， aceptar que tienes una enfermedad y pues como tal se puede curar。 Yo lo creo y lo espero。
Renae
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I don’t like self help books， I have a hard time getting through them。 If I had read more， perhaps this wouldn’t be so highly rated。 However， I found myself over and over thinking of loved ones who fit exact description， often sending screen shots and wanting to discuss with them。 It was an eye opener for me and one i will reread 。
Lucia
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DNF due to fatphobia
Toruk Macto
，
No， I'm not an Alcoholic or live with an Alcoholic Partner or has any relationship with Alcoholism。 This book hits my core value。 Yeah， I've this tendency to rescue people from their problems & fix things for themselves。 & I believe to some degree most of us have this that stems from sense of contribution & it's good thing。But when this rescuing & fixing things went to compulsive & desperate level， I understood， I was distracting myself from something real，from my problems & issues。 There is tha No， I'm not an Alcoholic or live with an Alcoholic Partner or has any relationship with Alcoholism。 This book hits my core value。 Yeah， I've this tendency to rescue people from their problems & fix things for themselves。 & I believe to some degree most of us have this that stems from sense of contribution & it's good thing。But when this rescuing & fixing things went to compulsive & desperate level， I understood， I was distracting myself from something real，from my problems & issues。 There is that deep conviction that my needs & wants are unimportant & don't deserve to be meet。 & But I want them to be met。From these comes this codependency part。 I wanted to rescue & fix others to get my needs met。 I expected them to understand my needs & wants without being told。 I went for indirect approach believing it's not ok to ask for your needs directly。 & That creates a lot of drama， blaming， shaming， controlling， manipulating & a lot of fucked up things。But this book really gives the insight that I needed。 I love the statement "I can still listen to people & choose not be responsible to fix them & can offer help & anything if they ask for。" & Lot of concepts like this。 I've internelized lot of them & implemented some of them。 These are really working & it's like lot of burden get off from the shoulder when you realize "Others are responsible fixing their problems， you are responsible for fixing yours only。"So， the bottom line is， " if you DESPERATELY want to help & fix others， may be it's you who need the help first。" This book will exactly do that for you。 。。。more
Nicole Teixeira
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While this book is geared towards individuals in relationships with people with addictions or personality disorders， I think this is a great book for anyone to read。 Especially if you’re interested in psychology or self-improvement。 The author lays out ways we can hold ourselves back when we try to control external situations that are outside our control。 She offers several frameworks that encourage you to pause， reflect and respond versus actively react， and establish healthy， loving boundaries While this book is geared towards individuals in relationships with people with addictions or personality disorders， I think this is a great book for anyone to read。 Especially if you’re interested in psychology or self-improvement。 The author lays out ways we can hold ourselves back when we try to control external situations that are outside our control。 She offers several frameworks that encourage you to pause， reflect and respond versus actively react， and establish healthy， loving boundaries。 My only criticism of the book is that it feels a bit outdated at times using references like “look in the phone book”。 。。。more
Tuna
，
this is great if u need to hear it but a little heavy on the God at times。 wouldnt have benefitted as much from this without relating to having an alcoholic in my life at diff times / having alcoholic tendencies but i recommend for codependent crime family regardless。 easy to digest and comforting
Alyssa Coombs
，
I would like to say that this book has changed my life。 My therapist told me this is “the Bible of mental health” and boy was she right。 If you haven’t read this i 100% recommend。 It does heavily relates to alcoholics so please note that for if your not ready for that at this point in your life due to any reason 。i have never dealt with an alcoholic however due to a previous relationship that involved DV。 i related to it， i became a codependant。 This book is worth the read 10281979875%。
Sarah Woodhams
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